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A Day With the Sony PlayStation 3D Monitor

Mark Walton
By Mark Walton, Senior Staff Writer - Reviews

The PlayStation 3D Monitor is slim and shiny and has all three Ds, but Mark and Johnny aren't entirely convinced it's worth the cash.

"That looks like a giant PSP," said Johnny as I eased the PlayStation 3D Display out of its cardboard coffin and onto my desk, immediately coating its glossy piano-black back and glass screen with fingerprints. "You fool!" I said. "It's clearly more like a Vita."

"No, it's a PSP Go minus the buttons."
"You didn't say PSP Go, you said PSP. Besides, how you would you know? You've never even used one."
"I've used your mum before, and--let me tell you--I know where her buttons are."

Clearly, this man was insane. But he was also a fountain of random technology knowledge. And in the world of 3D Display reviews, I needed a man like that--even if he had an unhealthy sexual fascination with my mother.

I let the comment slide and dug out the display's stand. Its two pieces slid together with a satisfyingly solid click, forming a firm base for the display to sit on. And as it stood, its black monolithic face reflecting the contents of my desk like some kind of unholy mirror, I realised Johnny was right--it did look like a PSP Go.

"It's a bit studenty," I said.
"Isn't that the point?" asked Johnny." Besides, I think it looks nice."
"I dunno. It's all a bit curvy for me. And those speakers on the side--it's like the Dumbo of displays."
"I'm not sure Disney could design something as sexy as this."
"What about the Little Mermaid? She was sexy."
"She's a fish. Fish aren't sexy."
"She has a seashell bikini. That's hot."
"So if I slapped a bikini and a wig onto a mullet you'd call it Sally and take it out to dinner?"
"It'd have to be a damn fine mullet."

He's probably thinking about me having sex with a halibut, I thought. First my mum and now fish. He needs help. Fortunately, the subtle orange glow of the standby light was enough to distract us from thoughts of fish fornication and move us on to more pressing matters. "We should probably test this thing out," I said. "What DVDs have we got?"

Johnny pulled out a copy of Max Payne from under a pile of crumpled papers on his desk. My heart sank. GameSpot UK's entire film library consists of only a single copy of Max Payne and a battered UMD of Spiderman 3--I wished to be subjected to neither. But this was for the greater good; the good of the Display-buying public. If it meant watching Mark Wahlberg make a tit of himself for an hour, then so be it.

The film looked good--even upscaled to the display's ample 1080p resolution. It handled motion smoothly, and the noir-influenced visuals looked suitably dark and the scenes suitably moody. They'd have been even better if not for the crystal-clear reflection of Seb slacking off and reclining in his office chair. The harsh, fluorescent glow of the office lights was not kind to shiny glass objects.

"Time to see what else this baby can do," I said. "Where's the Alienware?" Danny walked over and dropped off the 11-pound behemoth that is the MX17 on my desk. There was a dull thud sound as he placed it. I grabbed an HDMI cable, and--feeling my way past the display's component input--I snugly inserted it into one of the two HDMI ports. The other end of the cable clicked into place in the Alienware. I opened the laptop up, revealing a large, white, suspiciously shaped stain on the left palm rest. Danny said nothing.

The laptop booted, and a less-than-sharp Windows desktop appeared on the display. Games looked better: they were sharp, and the colours were vibrant, and the black levels were deep. There wasn't a hint of input lag either, at least to my non-pro-gamer eyes. By now Johnny had picked up a pair of the bundled 3D glasses, and he wasn't enamoured with their design. "These are well '80s," he exclaimed, before putting them on and parading around the office doing his best Geordi La Forge impression. It wasn't very good.

I picked up a pair and put them on. They lacked style. But, when you're wearing glasses over your glasses as I was, having style is an impossibility. At least the glasses' deep shape and sharp corners fit effortlessly over my own specs. And they worked well, instantly syncing with the display, itself instantly recognised by Nvidia's 3D Vision software, leaving me free to ponder why anyone would want to play a game in 3D in the first place.

"This is balls," I said to Johnny. "Everything's so dark now." The once vibrant colours on the screen had been filtered through a veil of muddy browns and greys. In a vain attempt to counteract the effect of the 3D specs, I booted up Gran Turismo 5 and picked the brightest car possible--a hot neon pink Lamborghini--but even that couldn't cut through the thick veil of darkness cast by the 3D specs. It was, at the very least, mostly smooth and flicker-free.

"Fancy trying out some Simulview?" I asked Johnny. "Sounds like a fun way to watch porn," he replied. Johnny was getting worse. We donned the specs again and raced a few laps around the Nurburgring, each of us enjoying the novelty of two-player racing with a whole screen to ourselves.

"This is damn clever actually," said Johnny.
"I know," I said, "very."
"Kinda saps the fun out of split-screen, though. I mean, what's the point if I can't cheat by looking at your screen?"
"Maybe you shouldn't be cheating?"
"No, I know, but it is part of the charm isn't it?"
"I suppose so."
"Still, I can see where this'd be useful."
"Where?"
"You know, on small TVs."
"You mean like this one then?"
"You're just nitpicking. It's pretty good, and you know it."
"I wouldn't want to play in 3D on such a small screen. Kinda defeats the purpose. Besides, it only works with six games."
"It's cheap, though, right? I mean, students and kids can't afford dick-all."
"It's four hundred and forty nine pounds."

Johnny put down the controller and calmly folded up his 3D specs and slid them back into their soft velvet case. "You'd have to be insane to pay that, or--at the very least--very, very high." I nodded. After all, this guy was insane. That left little hope for anyone else.

Mark Walton
By Mark Walton, Senior Staff Writer - Reviews

Writer, riff maker, purveyor of fine foods. Mark currently spends his days trying to overcome his small (large) obsession with high-top trainers and mobile games. He's known to respond well to Long Island Iced Tea, falafels, and karaoke, but not necessarily in that order.

51 comments
Hanus_mcAnus
Hanus_mcAnus

£449... that's like 600 euro. Think I'll just buy a regular old 1080p tv for my bedroom. I've got a 3DS anyways.

essam24
essam24

when they Looked on the screen they look like some 1 never did see something like this before (Oh Snap) xD

 

HapiJoel
HapiJoel

Waaaay to much sexual tension going on here, fun article though. I think you got the point across that Sony are doomed.

R1ckmister
R1ckmister

Well seeing i just bought a sharp 40" aquos quattron 3D 1080P TV which came with 1 pair of glasses (ok i know this comes with 2) a Free 2GB USB stick (holds the tv manual, nice freebie too) a free WIFI dongle for the tv & smart capabilities, free view HD tuner with it's LED backlit display for £499.99 @ sainsbury's! (still on offer! was £1,200 last year!) you have to be a nutter to buy this! glad my samsung pack up too as the 3D on those is terrible compared to my sharp! :D 3D is amazing, admittedly it wears off and some times i cbf to get up put glasses on then activate to mode, but yh don't buy this! get a proper TV! if this was £200 i would said job well done but no your talking 2011 premium model TV money now! which to 2012 models, isn't much difference apart from styling! 

ecurl143
ecurl143

Waay too expensive but I can guarantee the picture quality would be nothing short of spectacular.

You get what you pay for but that price needs to come down a few quid before I'm interested.

SicklySunStorm
SicklySunStorm

erm... OK. fish porn, more porn talk.... I dread to think what this guy has under his bed.

markavian
markavian

Everyone comparing this to their TV's, it's not a TV its a monitor, it has no TV tuner ability. And other than being overly shiny and a bit small, I would definately recommend this as a computer monitor, the picture quality is great.

1337h4xx0rz
1337h4xx0rz

@markavian I would also like to note that in Canada, this monitor is the same price in Canadian dollars - $449. That equates to 278 British Pounds. They are getting seriously ripped off.

1337h4xx0rz
1337h4xx0rz

@markavian I live in Canada, and I just bought a 52 inch Samsung 3D TV for 739.99. This 3D "Monitor" is 449 pounds - that equates to $724.00 Canadian, or $725.00 US (Thank you crappy US Dollar). What on earth possibly makes this a good buy? I paid $16 more for something that HAS TV tuner capabilities, AND can be a monitor! This product blows. Should be at least half of what they are charging for its worth. I would still not buy it even if it was.

Unchartedraider
Unchartedraider

 @markavian I cannot understand your point. For that price it should have a TV tuner but even without one it can still be used as a TV. Plug in a skybox or a digibox and there you go. We are comparing this to our TVs because for a similar figure you can buy a 3DTV that will be larger with better 3D effects and picture quality. So what's the point in buying this? You recommend this monitor because "the picture quality is great", a HP monitor for about £150.00 will have picture quality that's great! I'm sorry but this monitor is terrible value for money.

jayd02
jayd02

If I didn't know any better I would've thought this was ign.com and not gamespot.com

jayd02
jayd02

I almost got upset because he didn't say much about the TV, but when I read the headline I understand why.  Can we maybe get a review or maybe an in depth look on this TV rather then two pages from your life story of working at Gamespot?

daveg1
daveg1 like.author.displayName 1 Like

better screens out there for less cash..like hdtv's

itchyflop
itchyflop

will it be compatible with future console releases with better pixelltion ? at 600 dollar i would hope so. And does it come in a various screen sizes ? 

jarheadalex
jarheadalex

Split screen... with a whole screen to yourself! Now that would stop screen looking on COD. 

FALLENPUNISHER
FALLENPUNISHER

i have 3 lgtv`s  50 inch plasma which is ok

a 42 inch 3d led which the 3d is a bit crap and a 46 inch 3d one which is the dogs b&%%£$"s for most games and movies that are made well.  sony are worse than apple pricing that pos so high

Derugs
Derugs

lol this was hilarious.

gotrekfabian
gotrekfabian

I have exactly the same as Mc_Trickz, a full HD, 3D, 50" LG plasma TV ('murder getting it up four stories to my flat!) and this was only £600.00 about a year ago, it's probably cheaper now and maybe in the same range as this overpriced designer(Playstation) piece of nonsense from Sony. What's the point in pricing something niche in to a mass consumer market when your demographic is clearly not going to be able to afford it?

Sanguis_Malus
Sanguis_Malus

Sony...not just on another continent...on another planet. Silly pricing.

Mc_Trickz
Mc_Trickz like.author.displayName 1 Like

I got a 50 inch plasma 3d full hd LG so i don't care about this one and i like Sony but, as i said, i don't care about this one when i have something that's way better you know what i mean...

Unchartedraider
Unchartedraider like.author.displayName 1 Like

What the hell? For about the same price you can get a propper 3DTV like mine. I was worried the 3D might just be a gimmick but the 3D actually aids you in combat for Uncharted 3. You can see exactly where the bullets are coming from which not only helps you but it looks awesome. Also, with 3D content I swear the video looks sharper and MORE colourful than in 2D. I can't recommend my telly enough, go get yourself an LG 3DTV!

sestraux
sestraux

so this will be around  600? then... That is way too expensive for a student like me. I have my ps3 hooked up to my computer monitor which was only a third of that black mirror and it does not even reflect anything!

Tha_DRP
Tha_DRP

That was the funniest sh*t I've read in awhile!

matok1
matok1 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

Idk....... This 3d business just sucks

fire_Foxxx
fire_Foxxx

I got mine for 300$ CAD. it's an epic computer monitor. With HD3D AMD support it works with a few games.

Hairygrim
Hairygrim like.author.displayName 1 Like

"I wouldn't want to play in 3D on such a small screen. Kinda defeats the purpose. Besides, it only works with six games."

...Nintendo 3DS, anyone?

LeDarius_Turner
LeDarius_Turner

I got this on Christmas last year. It's nice but it suck playing it when the sun's up and it's dirty. It's even harder to clean it effectively without it scratching up or having streaks on it. 

P.S. Is there any way to clean a dust-riddled microfiber cloth?

SomePlayaDude
SomePlayaDude

This is like some Apple things. They are amazing but they cost too much for what it can do and have too many optional uses that is not necessary.

kais112
kais112

I have got a PC which plays any game in 3D for way less than that...

alexLmx6
alexLmx6 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Nowhere did anyone say this was supposed to be a review.  Anyways, I found this entertaining, and I agree that you would have to be eating red squirrels to think that this thing is a good purchase.

strawhat1987
strawhat1987 like.author.displayName 1 Like

this was meant to be a review right?

 

oh, GameSpot UK. That explains it all

Jim60360
Jim60360

I don't really care much for the TV, but that was an entertaining five minutes. Nice one.

persianlink
persianlink

Heard about it. Sounded fun at first, but the splitfullscreen mode isn't really that complicated and other TVs will probably copy that feature soon. And seriously, 500$ for a 24 inch screen? Gotta be kidding.

Bamul
Bamul like.author.displayName 1 Like

Don't know what's up with all the haters, I found this very refreshing as opposed to the usual article. :)

Spets_Naz
Spets_Naz

What was the article about?... ^^ Can anyone actually tell me the name of that device?

coruscant
coruscant like.author.displayName 1 Like

This is very much in the style of Catch-22... in a good way. OK, it's not good as a serious review, but as an article it's more interesting than most.

Gaming-Planet
Gaming-Planet

"What the hell am I reading?" Says 60's Spiderman reading this terrible review. 

VilandasUK
VilandasUK like.author.displayName 1 Like

The one thing I hate about this guy is that he try's to be funny, he fails every time but he still tells those jokes that will never be funny. WTF is with that?

stokely-
stokely-

TL;DR Tidy little TV, looks nice in HD, it does 3D, 3D is shit, glasses good for those with glasses though. Too expensive for what it is.

dribblecake
dribblecake

This is pretty much the worst review i've ever read. You're attempts at humour are pointless, unfunny and childish. You're whole experience with the 3D monitor was a waste of time and has done nothing for Gamespot or it's subscribers- it was a waste of Gamespot's money and a waste of every reader's time. Good work.

dribblecake
dribblecake

 "You'd have to be insane to pay that, or--at the very least--very, very high." You're not a comedian. You're a reviewer. Review. You're jokes aren't funny.

DeathProofDelta
DeathProofDelta

Very funny Mark. The suspiciously shaped stain on the left palm rest made me giggle. So whats this TV all about then? Rather expensive!

bsnimunf
bsnimunf like.author.displayName 1 Like

Thats the worst review I have ever read.

jwsoul
jwsoul like.author.displayName 1 Like

Annoying to read try a review not a story! Or provide both?.... Perhaps Adding the Funny s in Italic where needed not for the entire body of text. Erggh I could not read it all. Oh well just my bit on the article. As for the glasses well i gleamed little from this and it felt a little like bashing so i will wait for a more well structured review. 

Fayt1986
Fayt1986

looks nice but that superbad glare and price kill it for me.

Blagstock
Blagstock like.author.displayName 1 Like

That would be due to Danny's 'Alien Res-erection' would it?

QOSMSTR
QOSMSTR like.author.displayName 1 Like

"Danny said nothing..." lol

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