• 26Apr 13

  Played some Tomb Raider and Bioshock, feat. Breaking Bad, but not Iron Man 3

  ... until the computer's harddrive crashed. FML.

  I was actually having more fun playing Tomb Raider, but that's because I was playing Bioshock on the infinitely stupid 1999 mode: "Yo dawg, we know you like old school design, so we gonna put old school in your new school, so you can new school while you old school". I know that's not how the meme goes, but it certainly feels like that. I can still remember System Shock 2's design like it was yesterday, and it was everything about it that made it intense and difficult. You can't just slap on bigger/smaller damage models, expensive deaths, different mobs and call it 'old school design'. Twats. I might even do an editorial about it since it infuriated me so much.

  Oh right, Tomb Raider. I was having fun. A lot more fun that I thought I would. It's Uncharted with boobs, and it thinks taking the Uncharted relic collect-a-thon and slapping on 'find hidden info by viewing relic at X angle' is evolution. There is actually quite a bit of non-shooting things to do, but the rhythm of the game revolves around killing bad guys. Obviously Adobe's RPG of the year, then.

   Breaking Bad

  Admittedly too good. Not since The Wire have I hung out to see what happens in the very next episode, season, whatever. It screwed up my blog's agenda. I suppose it's karma for totally sh!tting on Game of Thrones previously.

   Iron Man 3

  Haven't seen it. Even with Shane Black directing, couldn't be arsed to see it. I think I'm getting superhero fatigue.

  Instead, I'll be hype for Fast & Furious 6. Might also be a time to find a girl chill enough to kick it with watching such a movie. Most of the time, at least in NZ, they're so strung up, they like watching their entertainingly neurotic films like Iron Man 3 and sh!t, but it doesn't really translate well for me outside the theatre. It's either that, or they watch those really dumb chick flicks - and only chick flicks - and so I end up having zero in common with them.

  So yeah, Fast & Furious 6, don't let me down.

  Here's a video of Vin Diesel singing a Rihanna song for good luck.

  Oh, and she use to be sooooo bad:

  

  Now she's just terribad.

  P.S Not to let down the pooheads that measure their e-peens against mine, in the last month I've watched Mid-August Lunch, Coriolanus, The Merchant of Venice, and I'm about to go on a Catherine Corsini viewing spree. Yeah, you had to google her name. *Puts on pretentious fedora and walks away*

  • Posted Apr 26, 2013 8:34 pm GMT
  • Category: Games
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• 5Mar 13

  Alfa Romeo; Movies; Alfa Romeo

  

   

   Oh yes, baby. The Geneva Motor 2013 motor show has unveiled a host of striking cars, including the mindblowing Ferrari LaFerrari, the playboy's Lamborghini Veneno, the very futuristic VW XL1, but for pure lust's sake, it's all about the Alfa Romeo 4C.

  If you're from the States and you're 20-something, you probably haven't been exposed to Alfa Romeo much at all, as the company withdrew from the market back in 1995. They are about to relaunch their brand this year, and they're going to kick it off with the gorgeous 4C.

  Alfa Romeo is the quintessential Italian car: it has the sportiness of a Ferrari, the luxuriousness of a Maserati, and the build quality of a Fiat.

   

  

    

  Don't be put off by exploding engines though, Italian cars are all about the passion. It's got some 240 bhp with some 258 lb-ft of torque, with top speeds of about 250 kmh/155 mph. In comparison, Ferrari's latest supercar has about 950bhp with 660 lb-ft and a top speed of 230 mph. It looks a bit paltry, then, but considering the latter is about a million dollars, and the 4C is about a hundred thousand dollars, it all makes a bit more sense.

  The key to the glory of the 4C, however, is that it's super light, so it's relatively modest 1.75 litre I4 powered engine can get you from 0-60 in 4.5 seconds. And it's the first time in ages Alfa have gone for a mid-engined rear-wheel drive setup. This thing is meant to be fun as f*ck to drive. 

  Did I mention it's Italian?

  The only problem I'm finding aside from the humble engine is that it's only available in twin-clutch tranmission. That's how dedicated they are into getting back into the States. Honestly, it's a bit sad the Fiat group are hedging their bet on assisted manual cars, because from my time driving their innovative Selespeed transmission ("It's the technology in a Ferrari!" Fiat and Alfa fans exclaims), it takes about half a day for it to change gears. Gimme a six-speed old school manual any day, per favore.

  Anyway, it's a good time for Alfas to come back Stateside, because all you guys had to rely on was Camaros and Corvettes to teach you about styIe. Trust me, those muscle cars have no styIe whatsoever. Camaro fans only turn heads because they're half expecting Bumblebee to transform any minute, and it kinda didn't help that the Transformers movies progressively sucked. Hopefully Alfa can develop some fine petrolhead connoiseurs in America. Justin McBride, you can stop dreaming about just owning a Supra 

   

  Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons

   

  

   

   Weird image, huh. Yes, that scene is suppose to be funny. And when you watch it, it's also pretty scary. That's "Journey to the West", Stephen Chow's reinterpretation of the cIassic Chinese novel as an action-comedy-horror epic. NZ gets a lot of Chinese/HK movies straight after domestic release, and me being me, I went to see it. Verdict?

  You should see it too.

  It's not as composed as Shaolin Soccer and Kung Fu Hustle, but boy is it absolutely nuts. It's the antidote to all that grimserious Chris Nolan-esque stuff plaguing Hollywood these days. If you can't wait to see it in your country, watch the 1987 Hong Kong cIassic A Chinese Ghost Story which is very similar in tone. Just don't bother with the 2011 remake.

   

  A Bone for Foolz3h

  Sorry Foolz3h, I know you've been waiting for me to talk about Tarkovsky, but I've completely forgotten what I had to say about him. What I do know is that the issues you brought up are correlated to the subject matter he was always toying with, and I don't think he ever rested on his laurels. Like Terrence Malick, he just could not figure out a way to convey his messages properly, and he certainly tried!

   

  The Hot Girls Picture Thing

  I know it's Lent, but if I don't throw at least one picture of a chick at the end of a blog I'm letting the boys down. So here's Chrissie Chau who stars in the Journey to the West movie. And hey, it's an Asian girl even champ would appreciate, for a couple of reasons as you can see below.

   

  

  

  

  

  Oh, I know that's not Chrissie, but you don't see many white girls with an a$$ that amazing. Seriously, I'd give up sex before I'd give up driving amazing cars.

  Well, unless Jessica Alba suddenly becomes available again.

  • Posted Mar 5, 2013 8:17 pm GMT
  • Category: Cars
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• 6Jan 13

  My New Years resolution: build a custom arcade stick.

  That's what I originally had planned, until

  

  For $65.87 USD. Yao Ming, bro.

  It's the 360 version, so I might get VF5: FS for Xbox anyway, coz Gagan of all people seems to be the only guy that is ever game for it. Gonna dual-mod it later this year too, so I can play DOA5 aka Virtua Fighter-lite and Mortal Kombat with more precise controls. Speaking of which, more people need to play Mortal Kombat. Need more people to exercise my police brutality on .

  And finally, I can jump into Street Fighter 4 properly, as I just left it when I sold my TE Fight Stick back in '09. Dunno if I cbf getting real good at it, but I would like to at least win one set when I play someone lol. For some reason I'm better at Third Strike at the arcade in the city than SSF4: AE, but probably due to lack of any good competition there.

  @Foolz3h i'll get back at you about Tarkovsky later. I got a bit to say about him lol

  • Posted Jan 6, 2013 5:44 pm GMT
  • Category: Games
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