This is where I tell you about myself, when I feel like it; rant, when I feel like it; and post random silliness, when I feel like it. I also post the occasional review, but that's mostly about games everyone has already played to death. I might put up some pretty pictures sometime, and maybe give this bad boy a header, but that's not my biggest concern.

• 17Oct 09

  On Plato and Beyond Good & Evil

  This isn't exactly like any blog I've done, and for most it probably won't be very interesting. But I took a philosophy course at my last school (the Art Institute of Pittsburgh), which I left roughly two years ago, and in it I learned a bit about Plato. One concept that stuck out to me was his Allegory of the Cave; it was significant to me because I noticed a lot of parallels between it and Beyond Good & Evil, a game I'd played not long before. It's not a perfect parallel, but the similarities are uncanny.

  My Intro to Communication professor asked us early in the semester to write an informal essay about a piece of media that held some significance for us. Informal being sort of a skill of mine, I seized the opportunity to ramble on about Plato and Ubisoft's cult hit. I figured I'd post it here, for anyone bored or interested enough to check it out.

  ---

  Ubisoft's "Beyond Good & Evil" was released in 2003 for GameCube, PC, PlayStation 2 and Xbox. The story follows a futuristic alien world called Hillys, which is under attack by an alien race known as the DomZ. A military organization called the Alpha Sections arrive around the same time. They claim to be a group dedicated to fighting the DomZ, and on the surface it seems as though they are.

  However, something more sinister is going on beneath the surface. The Alpha Sections do seem to fight the DomZ invaders off, but they're actually a false flag used by the DomZ to catch the people of the worlds they invade off-guard and lull them into a fake sense of security.

  As photojournalist Jade, you're tasked with aiding the rogue organization known as the IRIS Network, whose goal is to expose the DomZ-Alpha Sections conspiracy to the people of Hillys.

  Tyrone Miller, then public relations manager for Ubisoft, described the title as conveying a "need to investigate beyond the superficial facts of what is good and what is evil." Toward the beginning of the story, the main protagonist believes the Alpha Sections propaganda, but as she progresses through her own investigation Jade uncovers for herself the true nature of the DomZ invasion and aids the IRIS Network in revealing the conspiracy to the public.

  "Beyond Good & Evil" presents an interesting parallel to Plato's Allegory of the Cave. In this allegory, prisoners are bound, limbs and all, to the floor of a cave, held in place and facing a flat wall. These prisoners know nothing but this cave and the pictures they see on the wall, projected there by firelight. The pictures are shadows cast by statues that are in turn manipulated by men standing on a raised walkway in front of the fire.

  The prisoners of this cave remain as they are for their entire lives, unless one should somehow escape. When this escapee flees the cave he or she sees the world for what it truly is, instead of the moving pictures of the reality once shown to them. They may at first be unable to accept this, but should they return to the cave, their former home, they'll find it to be unreal or lacking.

  The old saying, "You can never go home," comes to mind.

  At that point, the escapee has a choice: he or she can either return and attempt to set the other prisoners free, or remain where they are. Should they choose to return and set their brethren free, the others may react violently or calmly accept their new reality.

  The IRIS Network serves as the prisoner. Recognizing Jade's photojournalistic skills, they decide to free her next, testing her skills with a mission before showing her the truth. When Jade decides to join IRIS Network and out them to the people, she learns the horrifying truth behind the invasion. As the game progresses, more people start to question the DomZ propaganda and believe the IRIS Network reports. By the last act of the story, the entire planet is allied against the DomZ and Alpha Sections due to an attempt to kill Jade.

  The world of Hillys, then, is a parallel to the imprisoned. When the game begins, they see only what the DomZ, through the Alpha Sections, want them to see. As Jade's exploits continue, they come to see the situation for what it is, actively protesting against the Alpha Sections.

  The DomZ and Alpha Sections are represented by all things projecting images onto the cave wall. They manipulate the statues and images by directing the Alpha Sections, who are in turn supported by the majority of media at the story's outset. They're the gatekeepers, allowing very little that questions them to slip through to the public.

  • Posted Oct 17, 2009 9:24 am GMT
  • Category: Games
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• 19Sep 09

  Like a Fox! (Top 5 Most Annoying Commercial Mascots)

  Some commercials are memorable because they're good. Unfortunately, it seems like most are memorable because they're horrible. Here's to those commercials that are bad because of annoying mascots.

  5. Taco Bell Chihuahua:

  The embodiment of two things that annoy me: Taco Bell and chihuahuas. If you disagree on either count, you're wrong.

  4. Max Aroni

  Don't remember this guy? I'm not surprised--I barely remember him myself. What I do remember is one of the most asinine commercials to come out of the late 90s. Picture a bunch of kids, shoveling some kind of grey stuff into their mouths in a grade school cafeteria. The lunch ladies laugh insanely as the children slowly poison themselves. The principal stares on with cold indifference as a child contracts malaria and dies on the spot. ...And then some annoying cartoon kid bursts into the cafeteria on a skateboard and starts rapping about mac & cheese, concluding his song with a triumphant shout of "MAX ARONI!" ...What. (Yeah, I know, the first part of the commercial wasn't nearly that cool, but just roll with it.)

  3. Crazy Fox... Fox

  This guy's pretty obscure, only appearing on G4 (to my knowledge) for a while. The Crazy Fox advertises those "get rich quick" schemes (under multiple domain names, though Crazyfox.com seemed to be the longest-running), saying that you'd have to be crazy to call to find out more--crazy like a fox! His catchphrase was annoying, sure, but it probably wasn't the worst part. To me, the worst part was the terrifyingly bad animation of the CGI fox. It's really something you have to see for yourself, and it's still probably something that might not bother you.Actually, I lied--the catchphrase really is the worst part.

  2. The General

  Auto insurance? Why not? I debated putting The Money You Could Be Saving With Geico up here, but it didn't annoy me nearly as much as this cornball. Why is he around? And why is he such a badly made 3d model? (The model itself is okay-ish, but it looks beyond outdated in the commercials.) There were better-looking CG characters in the 90s. Maybe someone's looking to save some money--And don't even get me started on his little poem he says at the end of every commercial.

  1. FreeCreditReport.com Band

  The single most annoying "mascot" is actually more than one person. It started off with a simple country song about selling fish to tourists in t-shirts, and then it snowballed into one of the most horrific and infectious advertising campaigns of all time. Once you get one of those awful songs in your head, there's no turning back--it has you, and it's never letting go.

  • Posted Sep 19, 2009 7:55 pm GMT
  • Category: TV
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• 28Aug 09

  Everything's Better With Aliens (District 9 Review: No Spoilers!)

  I saw District 9 with my family this week, and I'm not sure doing so with my family was necessarily a good idea--Those of you who have seen it probably know why, but for those who haven't... It's fairly violent and profane. There are some really graphic scenes of violence, but there's also quite a bit of implied bloodshed throughout the movie, and it makes for some really strong impact with some of the scenes.

  First off, it's not at all what I'd been expecting. In many ways, that's a really good thing. When I went in, I was expecting a relatively shallow sci-fi action movie, which would have been fine. What I got was a really interesting allegory for apartheid in South Africa, but with aliens. From outer space.

  The movie itself also differs considerably from how I'd been expecting it to unfold. Throughout the movie, you get little documentary snippets about the past and about some of the primary characters, both giving you a lot of background and kind of setting up for what'll happen next. It's a technique that's certainly been done before, but District 9 seems to make a point of using it really well: answering questions while also raising several more to be answered as the story progresses.

  The characters, for the most part, are very likable (at least the ones you see the most of are). I guess it's a good thing that a lot of them aren't quite so charming, considering most of the characters anyone will dislike are antagonists and are meant to be disliked. I like a villain you can sympathize with just as much as the next guy, but it is refreshing to see an antagonist who's either just plain mean or crazy.

  It's also very pretty, from the alien species living in District 9 to the various other special and visual effects (most of them used for the different kinds of alien weaponry). And that's kind of what I've come to expect of movies with Peter Jackson involved--It's not so much that the guy being involved immediately means the effects will be amazing, but it is an interesting correlation I'm starting to see. But even beyond effects, getting past that tangent, the camerawork is really, really good. It doesn't break new ground, but the whole thing is put together very well.

  District 9 isn't a short movie, but its 2+ hour length didn't feel at all that long. It was surprising to see it end so "soon," considering I'd half expected another plot arc to pick up as the climactic sequence began. Even so, it didn't disappoint and it didn't feel at all incomplete. If anything, it's good that it felt so short, because only so many movies can hold my attention so well that I'm surprised to find that they're almost over.

  I'm not going to spoil anything about the story here. I'd be doing anyone who hasn't seen it already a disservice. District 9 is easily the best movie I've seen since Gran Torino (I'm kind of a fan of Eastwood), and I'd highly recommend it to anyone. See this movie. I really doubt you'll regret it.

  • Posted Aug 28, 2009 5:25 pm GMT
  • Category: Movies
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