"Bring chaos to paradise and let it break the face of beauty." -envomtonix

• 13Oct 08

  Never Wanted To...Change

  Day after day, there's a constant change going on. It's the change of character, who you are, or what you grow up into. It's basically called maturing towards adults. Kids grow up into teens (that destroy things), Teens grow into Adults (who consume alcohol irresponsibly), Then Adults grow into old people (who forget things)...but this isn't about aging or growing up. This is a thing about a change from something, to another..sometimes good, sometimes bad.

  There is a band out there right now, playing music and such, whom I have known for about 6 or 7 years, or early 2002; so basically like 6.5 years more accurately. Anyways, the change of this is the fact the band started small, quite popular but still not too heard of. Their playing venues were adequate, a large bunch of fans were there and most of the shows were local. They played a bunch of shows, lots of them, appealing to the area of certain growing cities, of course depending on if this was a publicity tour for a new album...I don't know, I can't say for sure.

  As of lately, the attention has grown gigantically to the rate, the band receives play on the radio (though their earlier tracks, were pretty much 50 percent indecent and that would've been one edited track listing), they've even become so much of a band, they play shows to only the best of the state, major venues, and an image that's not the same...well not for me. It seemed to start with a song called "Shut Me Up"...it got a lot of rep and then I guess people got tuned in, started liking it more and more...more and more, then they went to Hot Topic and bought all their S*** off the shelves. Now they have a more mainstream song called, (video) "Never Wanted To Dance"...so now the so called independent and free is now popular and grown to the size of a nation's interest. So interested, even the growing fans of My Chemical Romance have something to relate to, Gerard Way's Wife...(hmmm)

  In either case, it's business to expand but it's also nature to stay the same. I guess like Murphy's Law Blog, I lost touch and sadly, I Never Wanted To Change but that's not going to happen. They changed, I didn't = I don't see eye to eye anymore. I have good memories of their shows with Tub Ring, that's all that counts. I still have my friends over with "Birds on a Wire". Things might change on and off, I guess I should somehow change myself so I can become, NOT, what I am. Think of this like evolution. You grow wings to fly so you can survive.

  Well whatever. I also had some free time so I also added a nice little union banner for my union; The Cafe Union. It's not the best I've done but I'm not the best at working with graphics and design.

  

  Oh, and I will be getting Saints Row 2 tomorrow, next week I will get my hands (ever so trembling hands) on some Fable 2, and then after that week; Fallout 3...what an awesome 3 weeks this will be...where am I gonna find the time for it all?

  • Posted Oct 13, 2008 7:23 pm GMT
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• 9Oct 08

  I Fought the Law...

  Whoever said it, whoever made it, whoever told me that it was whoever...but whoever said, "If you want something, chances are you'll never get it." Is it Murphy's Law that is associated with? The law that says, If I eat healthy I'll get fat or some opposite logic law like that?

  Well, with regards of my previous blog about Cold Emotion, it would seem that it would be accurate to say, I feel like it's Murphy's Law or Whosoever Law, that makes things the way that they are. And Ironically, Murphy's Law has been stated twice at work over the past two days, by two different people. Sounds like a coincidence I would be so more than willing to state this fact.

  But the good old Murphy's Law or whatever just states bland facts about life. If you build it, WILL THEY COME? Sorry Costner, there ain't no baseball with this field of dreams, this is a plain of reality and the ridiculous facts that sometimes trying too hard, is too hard to appreciate the fact. Whether you work at something so hard that it doesn't matter anymore. (cooking something so long, you're no longer hungry?) or maybe it's the fact that I've been trying so hard to get something and it just doesn't happen, and when I don't or don't expect it - it sporadically happens. It's the silly things like that, that get me confused but finally getting it makes things more understandable.

  In the previous blog, I would go and say that I had a large amount of affection towards something, perhaps I was so affectionate towards it, that it no longer meant anything to me. I have had this happen in the past, how I would do something here on GS...become so enthralled by it, just to give up a week after I started it. It can be a bit of a disaster when you don't get it and it just takes over your emotion.

  Let's just say that I won't try to think too hard, I'll stay down on level one and work on that than just jumping to level 20 or somewhere deep in thought and suffer mentally. I don't need to push something from nothing to everything, it's not like I'm so bored that I feel I can do everything. I'll keep things alive with my union, yes...MY UNION, and I will keep tabs and promote the growth. Feel free to check out one of my newest topics, Samurai Game. And if you're reading this, I had some sushi tonight at some Japanese Hibachi Grill. Salmon sushi, Onagi Sushi, and some Squid sushi...the kudos go to the salmon one. And yes Sushi is still awesome...just like Nobunaga's Ambition (and amazing difficult)

  • Posted Oct 9, 2008 8:27 pm GMT
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• 7Oct 08

  Cold Emotion

  I will try and be brief about this one...most of my others are long and about 3-4 paragraphs but I know the sense of detail you can go into something with a title like the one I gave for this one. I don't mean to speak drab and long, continuous ever so restating the facts, but I have been sitting around here watching and reading internet stuff...also sort of thinking of my life in a way. I know most people can claim they want to be something like a musician or a game developer, be rich or be a man with 4 kids (or 300 kids, Whew). I try to envision my placing, trying to understand something about myself. All I see is everything I ever care about, drastically ending...those that I have yet to happen like someone special I could end up caring about, it turns to blankness...the things that have yet to happen; turn to misery.

  I know I can be dark but I have no idea why things I see only end up in my head as doubt. I doubt myself in so many ways I wish I were like a guy on the street begging for a buck. I am not, instead I walk amongst the people too proud to be hassled by the lower, too rivaled by the people of higher rank, and the people of self-importance, all there is in life is gold and greed.

  I see so much failure around me that I pretty much believe something is going to happen in a bad way. I should have never figured out the reasoning for chaos (plz don't ask)...Anyways, I wish I could figure out why I see things so differently, why I don't get some simple questions, why is life so difficult, and how much brain damage I have had during my high school days?

  They say they never wrote a book about how to play with life like it's another game, but I can say playing it free-hand, does not make sense. I can't even understand why I seem afraid of something so general nowadays. I feel so evasive, I'm just waiting to be cornered until I give up...give in...and eventually get married because I had to. That's how I see romance now, Get em in the corner!!!

  Well at least I could make a joke at the end to make things more bright but I guess I'll have to figure out why I feel so empty and why things feel so weak and why my world just is not spinning as fast as it could

  • Posted Oct 7, 2008 5:52 pm GMT
  • Category: General
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