I have a birthday coming up at the end of this month, it 10 or so days.

And, I must say, I'm not really looking forward to it.

Sure, I'm probably going to get a rare treat of food and dessert, like I usually do for my B-day. I might even get a few decent gifts, or, at least, I'll be given money, so I can get what I want to get with it. And I'm really thankful that my family will do that sort of thing for me.

So, maybe I am looking forward to that.

However, I'm not looking forward to the reminder of the progression of time.

The reminder that time is moving, but things still haven't changed all that much for me.

I still don't have a job, same as last year. I've spent this whole year looking for a new one, with no luck. So much I want to do hinges on me getting a job.

I still want to do film, but because of my lack of transportation, I can't really. That's something else that hasn't changed since last year.

I recently missed a shoot where I was supposed to be an extra because I couldn't get a ride, not even from my folks, because some things came up that week that they needed the money they would've spent on gas for. It could've been an important shoot for me, if I was able to make it. But, since I wasn't able to make it, it wasn't. There were a lot of people I wanted to work with on that shoot, and now, I doubt that they would want to work with me. Fortunately, I was just an extra, so they really didn't need me for the shoot, but what if they had? The guy who was my contact on the movie said "no worries" when I told him my situation, but that doesn't keep me from worrying. I definitely don't want to get work on another movie until I get a car, or, at least, my scooter on the road. Which I can't do, because I don't have a job.

I still don't have a place of my own, same as last year. I really am getting sick of living with my family. Sure, I am really grateful to my folks for letting me live with them free of charge, because without them, I'd be homeless, without food, and without internet, but they really cramp my style. My little sisters also cramp my style, more so then my parents do.  If had a job and a car, I wouldn't have to live with them anymore.

I also still don't have a girlfriend, same as last year.

I haven't seen that woman from game night for almost two months time, since she hasn't been showing up. I don't think it's because of me, since I haven't said or done anything besides be nice and play board games with her. From what she mentioned during a conversation we had, she probably isn't going because she doesn't like being out in traffic. Or it could be something else I don't know anything at all about, since I haven't had the chance to get to know her better. I know she goes to game night on Sunday. But, my feelings for her have cooled, and I'm not sure I want them to be sparked again. However, I still want to be friends with her, if not anything else, if I ever do see her again.

I am keeping my options open. There are plenty of women in the world. However, how many of them would want a boyfriend who doesn't have a job, or a car, or a place of his own? Not very many, if any at all. That's why I haven't really pursued a serious relationship, no matter how much I would like one.

I think I'm starting to feel my age. I'm four years away from 30.

What's worse, I'm feeling stuck.

On the bright side, I might be going back to college.

I found a relatively cheap college in Florida that I should be able to afford with what's left of my FA. And, if nothing goes wrong, I should be able to finally graduate, not to mention study something I already know I want to do for a career, since they have a film type degree. I've already been accepted, but there's paperwork that they need before I can even find out how much FA I'll be getting. If all goes well, I should be attending this fall. I'm trying not to get to excited about going back to college. About studying something I've always dreamed about doing. About being around college girls again. Because something could still go wrong, and I won't be able to go.

I'm just hoping things will change, and I'll be able to get a job, and a car, and a place of my own. And, I hope it's soon.

Then maybe I'll be able to look forward to my birthday, instead of dreading it. Hopefully, it'll be better next year.

That's all for now.

You might have noticed that I have been blogging on here instead if vlogging on YouTube, like I said I would. Well, I did that for a while, and now I've decided to mostly stop vlogging. I did 30 or so vlogs before I realized something. I'm actually a very boring vlogger. My last few vlogs got either no views, or almost no views. It's not really surprising. I have a boring life, and nothing much going on that's interesting or entertaining to vlog about.

BTW, thanks to my 6 subcribers who've stuck around, despite my boring vlogs.

 I've decided to switch gears, and change my YouTube channel into a gaming channel.

I actually had one before, separate from my vlogging channel, that had Minecraft videos. But, due to some technical difficulties, I stopped doing it. I just didn't have the right software, or a good enough gaming headset, to do it properly. But, now that I have FRAPs and a decent gaming headset, not to mention Windows Movie Maker to make the files smaller, I'm able to record game play footage. And, since I'm not going to focus on vlogging anymore, I decided to turn my main YouTube channel into a gaming channel.

The first game I'm featuring is Cthulhu Saves the World by Zeboyd Games. It's about Cthulhu, who is cursed to have to become a hero, and save the world, hence the title. I contacted the dev and asked their permission to the the game on my channel. They said they didn't have any problem with me doing it, which was nice of them.

I'm actually thinking of featuring mainly indie games, since I figure indie devs would be a lot nicer about letting me feature their games on my channel then a big company would be. I also just happen to have a ton of indie games from the Humble Indie Bundles.

I'm using CStW as sort of a training game, to practice what I want to do for other games. I've been doing it in character (mostly) and I think it coming out pretty decently, so far.

You can check out the first episode here:

Thanks for watching, if you do.

That's all for now.

This is going to be a Top Ten wishlist of cars I would want in my garage if I was filthy rich, and could afford to have a garage full of cars.

#1 The Mini Copper S

I was intrigued by the Mini Copper when I saw it in the Bourne Identity. It was featured in a rather intense chase scene in Paris, and it seemed like a very capable car, if a small one. Then I heard it was used in rally racing, which, to me, is more like real racing, unlike the boring NASCAR racing we have in the States. Actually, I'd probably be as bored watching rally racing as I am watching NASCAR, but, to me, a rally race would be a lot more interesting to be in. It doesn't have just left turns, it also has right turns, and could be on all sorts of terrain. A Mini Cooper actually was used to win a few rallys back in the day, thus proving it is, indeed, a very capable car. Anyway, the S version is a faster, turbo charged, version of the car. The Mini has good gas millage, making it ideal for both city and highway travel. It can also drift, if you can figure out how to do that in a front wheel drive car. And, best of all, despite it's small size, I could actually fit in a modern Mini. Hmm, maybe it's like the Tardis. Of all the cars in this list, it's the one I'm most likely going to get, since it's a lot cheaper then any of the others.

#2 The Marauder

I've wanted this car ever since I saw it featured in an episode of Top Gear. In fact, here's a clip from that episode. As you could see in the clip, it is a rather large vehicle. In fact, I'd call it "me sized", which is the main reason I would want it. Not to mention it's rather good at crushing things, crashing through walls, and other fun stuff like that. It has the distinction of being a military vehicle converted to being a civilian one. I'm assuming, since it's so big, it's MPG is horrendous, and also that it can't drift, but the sheer intimidating awesomeness of the vehicle more then makes up for it in my book.

#3 The Lamborghini Veneno

I'll admit something. The main reason I want this car is because it has scissor doors, which, to me, is the most sensible door design ever invented. They open vertically, so no worrying about some jerk parking next to you and blocking the opening of the doors. The Veneno also happens to be the most bada$$ looking super car I've ever seen. I mean, just look at it! I also think it's a much better design then the usual Lambo fare, which, to me, look like rectangles on wheels. Unfortunately, for the world, Lambo only made four, since it was made to celebrate the company's 50th B-day, or some ludicrous reason like that.

#4 The Tesla Roadster

It's an electric sports car that sounds, to me, like a landspeeder. 'nuff said. Well, I guess I could refer you to a previous blog I wrote about it.

#5 The Mustang Boss 302 (2012 version)

I've wanted a Mustang for quite some time. To me, the name evokes the wild west, which, incidentally, is why Ford named it that. It's also, to me, a much better looking car then most other cars, especially most Lambos. Why do I want this particular version? I'll tell you. It's a freaking street legal race car! Well, except for a few fiddly bits that race cars have and civie cars can't have. I don't really care about fiddly bits, in any car, all I care about is that it's a Mustang, it can drift, and it goes fast.

Speaking of going fast...

#6 The Veyron

The Bugatti Vayron is the fastest production car ever. Or, at least, it was last time I checked. Even if it isn't anymore, it's still a damned fast car. Top Speed around 250 MPH. It's also something of a one trick pony, like most super cars. I, mean, everyone always talks about how fast it goes, but it really doesn't have much else going for it. Oh wait, it has heated seats, a GPS, and a stereo, among other fiddly bits? Well, that's a little better. However, I have to ask, where is anyone actually going to be able to drive at 250 MPH? If I bought one, I'd also have to buy a race track. Still, being able to go that fast, t'would be nice.

NOW, we get to the realm of fiction...

#7 The Batmobile (Tumbler version)

If there was a production civie model, it might even beat out the Marauder as my second favorite car. As it is, the Tumbler left a huge impression on me. With it's rather large wheels, it's ability to shoot rockets (one of those fiddly bits they couldn't have in the civie version) it's absolutely fierce appearance, it's guns (also would have to be taken out), it's jet engine (probably that too), all in all, it's a very intimidating vehicle. Which, of course, is why I like it. Hrm, I'd also say it's "me sized".

#8 The Batmobile (animated series version)

To me, this is the quintessential Batmobile. Why? Because I'm Batman! Just kidding. Really, it's because, to me, Batman the Animated Series is the best Batman TV show EVER! The design of the car truly captures what it is to be a Batmobile. It also has bat wings, something they forgot on the Tumbler.

#9 Kitt (original version)

Kitt is the car from Knight Rider, a TV show that also starred some dude later known for running around in red shorts with his shirt off. I, of course, watched the show for the car. Kit was based on a Pontiac Trans-am, which is actually a cool looking car. However, the main reason I would want Kitt is because he is a freaking talking car that can drive himself! He is also intelligent enough that I would call him a "him", and not "it", or worse, "she". I think the only reason he kept Mr. Knight around was because he had thumbs. Well, that and his programming and the fact that they were friends. But, mainly, because of his thumbs.

#10 The Deloren (part 2 version)

I would never actually get a Deloren. I hate gull wing doors, it's the most impractical car door design ever. That is, I would never actually get a Deloren if it didn't have a built in flux capacitor, not to mention the other fiddly bits that made time travel and flying possible. Then, not only would I not need roads, I'd also be able to go to the future, then go back in time, then make a pit stop in the present, then go back to the future.

So, there you have it, my top ten cars. There were other cars I feel deserve to be named, like the Ecto-1, Optimus Prime, the Car from The Car, Black Beauty, and James Bond's Aston Marin DB5, but this was a top ten, so they get honey wantons. I also didn't include vehicles like the Bat-bod, the light cycle, the Tardis, etc, because it was about cars.

Now, I'll leave you with what I would consider to be the ultimate car.

It would be Kitt installed into the Veneno with the flight upgrades from Back to the Future. So, not only would the car be able fly, the car would also be able to drive itself...er...himself, thus avoiding the horrendous traffic accidents that surly would follow if humans ever really got their hands on flying cars. And, look on the bright side, if the Kitts ever took over the world, they'd still need our thumbs.

So, what's your favorite car?

Do you think there's some I cars I missed that deserve honey wantons?

What do you think the ultimate car would be?

That's all for now.

I'm posting this here instead of vlogging about it because I feel more comfortable posting it here then on YouTube.

It's kinda personal, so normally I wouldn't post it at all, but I feel like I have to express it in some way, or I might explode.

It's these goram annoying emotions.

Something that could be called love, the most annoying one.

Something that is definitely pain, which never goes away.

Something that may be longing, that's always unfulfilled.

Of course, it's about a woman.

I've blogged about this sort of thing before, and ended up deleting it, more because it was depressing then because it was personal. Because of what always happens in my attempts at relationships. They never go well, and always end in pain.

I had a bad experience late last year, which I don't think I blogged about. I fell in love, and got my heart broken, as usual. It was the worst one yet. This girl did everything every other girl has done to me, all rolled into one. We were never anything besides friends, so at least I can still say I've never had a girlfriend. After what she did to me, I'm glad, because it would've been much worse if we were romantically involved.

I've recovered enough, it seems, that I can meet a woman and feel that I might want to take a chance with her, a chance at another broken heart. Or, a chance at real love, that goes both ways, and not just one sided love, like always happened before.

I've been going to game nights every Tuesday and Thursday, at my local game shop.

And there I met a woman.

Of all the game nights, in all the cities in the world, she had to be in mine.

Well, technically, she was there first, but still.

I think I might be falling in love with her.

She is Hispanic, so she has those traits I find most attractive, dark hair and dark eyes. She also has an accent I think is very sexy. She is beautiful, and athletic, also traits I find to be very attractive. She also has an amazing smile.

But that's all externals, and not what really matters. Not what would make me fall in love with her, I learned that lesson long ago. Although, it doesn't hurt that she's as hot as she is.

I don't know her very well, because I haven't known her very long. But, I know enough to perhaps spark that most annoying of emotions.

She doesn't have a wedding ring, which probably means she's single. She also hasn't mentioned a boyfriend, or any other sort of significant other, which most unmarried women I meet mention within the first five minutes of meeting me. So, she might actually be completely single! I haven't asked that dreaded question yet, partly because I dread the answer, and partly because I don't want to even hint that I might feel something for her.

She has a job, which to me is a requirement in any woman I might be interested in. What I want to do for a job is risky, and I wouldn't want anyone to be wholly dependant on me for their survival, in case everything goes bad with what I'm doing.

She likes Star Wars, and is into other geeky things like boards games, so she's one of those mythical hot geek girls. We actually seem to have a lot of that sort of thing in common.

She only eats veggies, but she doesn't seem like one of those "eating meat is EVIL" types. So, it's probable it's more for heath reasons then anything else.

She also seems like she is a very beautiful person on the inside. I've only seen hints of what could be a beautiful soul, but what I've seen makes me want to know her more.

So, yeah, I can pretty much count what I know about her on one hand.

This is what usually happens. I meet a woman, and as things go on, that annoying emotion is sparked. Well, it's more like a snowball rolling down a hill then a fire. As it rolls, as I get to know the woman more, the snowball gets bigger, that annoying emotion gets stronger. But, usually what happen is that when it gets to the bottom of the hill it falls into a pit of lava, everything goes wrong, and I'm left with a broken heart and more pain.

It's what happened last time. I'm not sure if I want to risk it happening again. But, I'm also not sure if I don't.

There's also, of course, how she feels about me. As far as I can tell, she likes me. She always smiles when she sees me, and it seems genuine. She seems happy to see me.

However, as far as I can tell, she also thinks of me only as a friend. Someone to occasionally play board games with at game night. She really likes my favorite game, Heroscape, and we've played it a few times.

The main reason she's there is to play board games. It's also the main reason I'm there. We just happen to be there occasionally at the same time. And I just happen to be falling in love with her.

The thing is, it's not a snowball rolling down a hill. It's more like a car going down a hill. I have some control over it. Not as much as I'd like, but still some control.

As the car rolls, it gains momentum, but I can still put on the brakes. Part of me wants to do that, stop going to games nights, stop seeing her, let my feelings for her die and move on. I would've been better off if I did that last time. But, that part of me is the fear talking.

Another part of me wants to keep going down the road, and coast, taking no action whatsoever. But, that's the best way to be permanently in the friend zone, something I'm sick of happening, and also the best way to not even be friends. However, I also don't want to wreck game night, for the both of us, so perhaps that would be the best course.

Then there's what I hope will happen. I could put on the brakes, just enough to slow down and stay at a nice controllable speed. Sure, that pit of lava is still at the bottom of the hill, but I could still stop before I go into it. I could even avoid it all together. Because, I'm not the only one on the road.

She could also be said to be in a car, following her own course. She's her own person, making her own decisions. Maybe she'll decide that I'm someone to be more then friends with. Maybe she'd even fall in love with me. It could happen. That chance, however slim it is, makes me want to keep going and see what happens.

Now we come to the reason I even started writing this. Tonight is Tuesday, the night I would usually go to game night and see her there. However, tonight, instead of going to game night, I'm going to a film networking meeting about film festivals. I'm going mainly because I need a cinematographer for my project, and I know that there's going to be a few there. I've reached an impasse with my project because I don't have one on the team, and I'm hoping I'll meet one who will want to be on it.

So, it's the logical choice to sacrifice going to game night, and playing board games, not to mention seeing that woman, in favor of going to the film meeting.

However, because of that annoying emotion, I feel like I should go to game night instead, just to see her. The main reason I think I could be falling in love with her is because when I'm around her, it doesn't hurt so much. When she's around, I forget the pain. Being around her makes me happy. When she's not around, part of the reason it hurts is because I miss her.

Today, I'm doing the logical thing. But, there's always next Tuesday.

Problem is, I've been hurt so bad before, that even the slightest hint that I might be falling in love scares me. And that's all it really is, a small spark, a tiny snowball just starting to roll, a car just beginning to gain momentum.  Maybe there's a pit of lava at the bottom, and maybe it'll be nothing at all, or maybe it'll be love.

If there's one thing I leanred is that it takes two to tango, and both of them have to want to tango.

I'm just hoping that someday she'll want to tango with me.

Wish me luck.

That's all for now.

I've played many horror games in my time as a gamer. Games like Dead Space, Resident Evil, Resident Evil 4, F.E.A.R, Amnesia: the Dark Decent, Left 4 Dead, just to name a few.

Horror games have been something of a pet peeve of mine since I started playing them. Because, even though they are called "Horror" games, none of them have ever horrified me.

There is a old story by the Brothers Grimm, about a boy who was never afraid, and desperately wanted to know what fear was like. Unlike him, I know what fear is like, however, no video game has ever made me feel that emotion. I have been surprised, grossed out, and pissed off by horror games, but never scared.

So, whenever I hear someone say "OMG, this game is so scary, I pooped my pants, you should totally play it!!" I am always skeptical. I also always question why anyone would want to play game that would make them poop their pants, but that's beside the point.

My question is, why have I never been scared by a video game?

The most obvious answer is, of course, that it is a video game.

It constantly reminds me that it is a virtual experience created for entertainment, and not real. It constantly reminds me that I am in no danger, because I am playing it from the comfort and security of my own home. It constantly breaks my immersion, and my suspension of disbelief.

Take Dead Space, for instance.

While others have said that game is terrifying, I would say it a game with decent combat, with an interesting dismemberment mechanic. It has a dude with a space suit, with a nice way to tell how much health he has left integrated into it, and you control him to fight space zombies. They come in strange and disgusting forms, relentlessly attack you, and jump out at you from surprising places. But, not once was I ever scared by them. It was very obvious, from the dude on the screen, that I was playing a video game.

Gross? Yes. Scary? No. Oh, hi Isaac.

Perhaps it is a matter of perspective.

Perhaps third person isn't really a good perspective for horror games.

Yes, it could be said that a TPS let's the player connect with the character they are controlling, and makes them want to keep them alive. I will even admit that, while playing Dead Space, I would really rather not have Isaac get killed by the space zombies. But, that could be said about any TPS that I would be playing.

In an FPS, you see the game world from the perspective of the character you are playing the game as. Surely that would be better at conveying horror, make it more like the player was the one experiencing it.

That's what I thought, until I played Amnesia: the Dark Decent.

Amnesia is a game that has also been called very scary. However, I must disagree.

Amnesia being played from a first person perspective means that you see it from the point of view of the main character Daniel. Unfortunately, you also get Daniel's reactions as part of the package. When he is scared, he will stumble around. The camera will wobble around like it is possessed, and it is, by Daniel. Daniel would also breath scaredly and scream in fear.

Did I mention the nausea inducing camera effects?

When he started reacting it completely broke my immersion. I could no longer suspend my disbelief. When he stumbled around, it didn't scare me at all. All it did was piss me off. I stopped playing Amnesia immediately after I realized that was how the whole game was like.

When I play a first person game, I expect to be the one playing it. I expect the one to be reacting. I expect to be actually in control of the character I'm playing as. When a game takes that control away, as part of some silly fear mechanic, it breaks all immersion I had in the game. F.E.A.R. had a similar mechanic whenever Alma was rude enough to show herself. The only thing that saved F.E.A.R. and kept me playing it was that it's actually a solid FPS, something Amnesia wasn't.

It seems that all "Horror" games fall into these two categories, games with a dude filling half the screen and FPS games with a character who won't shut up and let me be the one who is scared. Neither of which end up being very scary, to me, at all. Because both are full of constant reminders that they are video games.

For me to be scared by a video game, it would have to be as much like real life as a virtual, non-lethal, experience can be.

A game without any immersion breaking characterization.

Then maybe I could actually be scared by a video game.

Here's a little song I wrote just now. It was inspired by some of the comments on the articles about those politicians that were bashing video games, Synthia's blog about them, and a comment by ChiliDragon on her blog. The verses were inspired by various video game stories. It could use some work, and a melody to go with it, but here's how it is so far...

---
Chorus:

Not all gamers are kids,

Didja know?

The average age of a gamer is 30,

Didja know?

Gamers come from all walks of life,

Didja know?

-
I run across the rooftops
Avoiding the guards
My hand on my sword
ready to draw
I spot my target
on the ground
I leap, I strike
again

What makes you think
This game is meant for kids?

-
My wife and kid are dead
They're gone and I'm left alone
Nothing to do but sit and think
Nothing to do but sit and drink
But a mans gotta work
A mans gotta fight
If he's gonna live
again

What makes you think
This game is meant for kids?

-
I'm on the wrong side of the law
Life doesn't mean much to me
Cops are always after me
I figure I don't have much to lose
I just drive around
Looking for a good time
Sometimes I gotta run
Again

What makes you think
This game is meant for kids?

---

So, how'd you like it?

Do you have any suggestions for verses, or any other improvements?

Thanks for reading this.

That's all for now.

Are you sick of ignorant people who don't know anything about video games bashing them?

Do you think some parents out there don't know what game their kids are playing?

Then educate them!

Do you have Facebook or Twitter or a Blog, anything on Social Media?

Then post about video games!

Post about the rating system!

Post that not all video games are meant for kids!

Be nice about it though, since insulting someone is never a good way to persuade them to your point of view.

Also, even if they don't read what you posted, at least you did post about it, and maybe they will read it.

Maybe they will indeed be educated!

What are some examples of what you could post?

Well, I'm glad you asked! Here's something I posted to facebook...

"Dear Parents,

Next time one of your children wants you to buy a video game for them, please look at the cover of it first. You might notice a large capital letter in a white box in a corner of the cover. That letter is part of a rating system, similar to the ratings for movies. If it's a letter M, that means the game is M-rated, which is similar to the R-rating for movies.

The M-rating means that the game is suggested for people older then 17, and may contain content not suitable for people under that age. There is also the T-rating, games that are suggested for people 13 and up, and the E rating, games that are suggested for everyone.

These ratings were made by the ESRB, an orgainization who's mission is "To empower consumers, especially parents, with guidance that allows them to make informed decisions about the age-appropriateness and suitability of video games and apps while holding the video game industry accountable for responsible marketing practices." You can find more information about them, and their ratings, at their website, www.esrb.org.

Please use your discretion when choosing what games to buy for your kids.

Have a nice day!"

Or, you could post something shorter, something I actually did tweet...

"Dear Parents, Here's a tip. Not all video games are for kids. If there's a M in a white box on the cover, it's not for kids. It's M-rated. "

Please feel free to use what I wrote here in your posts, or feel free to use your own words. Post examples you may have in the comments below.

Please also keep in mind what I said about being nice!

Thanks for reading this, have a nice day!

That's all for now.

I haven't been blogging lately because I've been vlogging, every Friday, on YouTube.

I prefer vlogging to blogging because I've noticed that some things, like, say, sarcasm, can be lost in text. With a vlog, the viewer actually sees my face which I am talking, so they see my expression, and they also hear my tone of voice, so they can tell, for instance, whether or not I'm being sarcastic.

I'm still developing my style for vlogging. I'm actually very nervous about it, since I'm not used to it yet. I record them in one take, so it's more like a conversation (you don't edit your conversations, do you?), but that means if I mess up, and I have to do another take. It can get annoying (once I did, like, 10 takes before I got it right), but I also think it helps me get what I'm trying to say clearer in my head. I started off with bullet points, but I've done away with them, because it just didn't feel natural. It doesn't feel natural without them, but it's getting there.

I haven't got many views yet, or many subscribers, but I haven't been doing it for very long. I am, of course, hoping that I'll eventually have more of both. I'm thinking about eventually turning my vlog into a daily one, when I have more going on in my life.

Right now, it's pretty boring, I only have stuff to do on Tuesday and Saturday, not to mention my vlog on Friday, so I don't have much to actually vlog about. Hopefully my life will be more eventful in the future, with more good events then bad. We shall see.

I'm still going to be somewhat active on this site, since it's the only gaming site I consistently browse, and there are enough people with blogs that I consider good enough to read. I also might, and that's a big MIGHT, blog some more, if I see a community event that I'm interested enough in to bother with.

BTW, if you wanna find out what not boring stuff I do, you'll have to watch my latest vlog. Views are always appreciated! I also wouldn't mind seeing some of my pals on gamespot over on youtube.

My youtube channel is MrStarduke.

That's all for now.

Disclaimer: I don't just play on PC, I also have a Wii, a PS2, and a DS lite, but PC is what I spend most of my time gaming on, so I'll focus on that for this blog. I'm going to write briefly about games that I played that stood out during my time as a gamer, at least, the ones that occur to me as I write this. I'm probably going to think of more later, and facepalm, because I didn't include them. However, I'm writing a blog, not a book, so I can't include all the games that I've ever played.

I've been playing video games for as long as I can remember. It's been, at least, a decade since I first played a video game.

I started out when my dad bought home an Apple 2 e. It wasn't when it first came out, it was many years after, and he got it because someone else was getting rid of it. It was at a yard sale. That computer was older then I was. It was still a big deal to us, since it was our first computer. It came with a lot of games, like Asteroids, Adventure, Oregon Trail, F-15 Strike Eagle, and Defender, among others.

Ah, yes, Defender. That was my favorite game of the bunch we had. I loved flying around in my space ship and shooting aliens, blowing them up with bombs, and saving people when the aliens abducted them. I felt like Luke Skywalker. It was amazing, and started my love of sci-fi video games.

A year after my dad got the Apple 2 e, we finally got a more modern computer. I went with my mom to Wal-mart to pick it out. It was a brand new Windows Millennium Edition HP PC, and it cost $1000! My rig I have now could eat that and have room left over for a 100 more, and it only cost me about $600! But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

That WinME PC was my entry into a wider world of PC gaming. Or, at least, it was after I got a video card for it. Until then, the only game I played on it was Solitaire, which came with it.

I can't remember the first game I ever got for the WinME, but there are a few that stand out from that time.

I got Deus Ex GOTY, and still, to this day, it's one of my favorite games. I loved having all the options in that game, and being able to play it how I wanted to. I loved the branching storyline, every time I played it I came across something I didn't do before. It also introduced me to the world of Cyberpunk, and sparked my love of that. Technology, good or bad, it's gonna be awesome! It also came with a soundtrack, which started my love of video game soundtracks.

I also got Freespace: The Great War, which continued my love of sci-fi games and ignited my love of space sims. It's also the first time I was creeped out by a bad guy in a game, before I even saw what they looked like. They were the Shivans, and initially they had technology far superior to what the player had access to. They weren't even visible on my space radar, the only way I could see it is if I actually saw it, and my weapons couldn't get a lock, or do much damage. So, in the first mission they appeared, they just showed up and started killing. The only choice I had was to run, something I hate having to do. Of course, later on, I got my revenge, and was able to start blasting Shivans out of space.

I also got Halo: Combat Evolved. Ironically, it started my love of playing FPS games on the PC. I liked that Master Chief didn't talk much, so it felt like I was the one stomping around in my Mjolnir armor and blasting the Covenant. It also was the second time I was creeped out by a bad guy in a game. They were the Flood. Brr, The Flood. I remember backpedalling like crazy and blasting at them with my shot gun, and them not stopping, because they were mindless space zombies who didn't care how many of them I turned into space mush.

After many years I got my own PC. Actually, I got a few, right now every computer in the house is one I owned at some point, except my little sister's laptop. Usually, what would happen is that I would get a computer, then I would get a better one and give the old one to my family. They'd use it for internet, and to play those lame facebook games, so they didn't need a high end PC. This went on for a few years, and during that time I played a few game that really stood out.

During this time I started to get compilations of older games. I got two that had a lot of Star Trek games together, and had a blast playing them. Yes, I am a Trekkie. One had Armada 1 and 2, and Elite Force, with it's expansion, and the other one had Star Fleet Command, and Star Fleet Academy. They were some really awesome games. Of course, I'm biased, because I am a Trekkie, but they were good even if you aren't one. I'll pick one to write more about

Armada was a solid RTS game set in the Star Trek Next Generation universe. The Borg were making trouble again, and it's up to the player to stop them. It was cool, because they had Patrick Stuart actually do the voice of Captain Picard, and even better, I got to order him around. It was also surprising how mean I could be to my favorite Star Trek character. "Oh, look, a black hole. Hmm, I wonder what would happen if...Picard go in there."

I also got a Star Wars collection of games, called the Best of PC, which had Knights of the Old Republic and Empire at War, among others.

I really enjoyed KOTOR, and it's still a game I play from time to time. It felt different from other PC RPGs I had played, and it wasn't until later I realized it was "Consolized". Whatever. It was still a blast, and probably the best Star Wars RPG to date. I really enjoyed the story, and the major plot twist that everyone probably knows about, but, in case some people don't, I won't spoil it. Go play the game, if you want to find out what it is. It's a doozy.

It was also during this time I discovered both Steam and Gog.com, which became the main ways I get games. It changed the way I saw games. I didn't need discs anymore! I know some people would rather have discs, but I've had discs get wrecked, or stop working for seemingly no reason, and not having to have disc was liberating. Steam, however, isn't as liberating as Gog.com, since Steam is DRM, with features that make it bearable, like being able to play with friends easily and the community features, while Gog is completely DRM free. So, if a game is on both Gog and Steam, I get it on Gog.

Then I got my current gaming rig, which I built myself.

That was an adventure. I did a ton of research into the parts I would get, to make sure I got the most bang for my buck, and that they would all play together nicely. Then I ordered them off of Newegg (strange name for a great store) and, following the instructions, I put them together into a working PC. I had a slight problem putting the cooling system to the CPU in, and, because I missed something in the instructions, I ended up not plugging my video card in to the power. After I plugged it in, I finally had my very own gaming rig, which I built myself. I think that should be something of a right of passage for a PC gamer.

I got it back in February, 2011. It might not be the best PC in the world, but it still handles everything I've thrown at it at Max, or near Max, settings. I'll probably have to upgrade in 2014.

I also decided to get an HDTV to use as a monitor, since that's something ignorant console fanboys say you can't do with PC games. Well, you can, and I proved it!

Okay, really, I got it because I figured it'd be better then having both a TV and a monitor, since I could use it for both my PS2 and my PC, and that's exactly what I did.

After I got my rig, my gaming really exploded.

Like that.

Anyway, I had a PC that I could play my games on, without worrying too much about whether or not they would work.

There are a lot of games that really stood out from that time until now, too many to really talk about in this blog. So, I'll limit myself to three. This is gonna be hard.

A game that really stands out as one of my faves is Fallout New Vegas. I still play that game occasionally. It's the game that really sparked my love of player created mods. I really liked it because it blended a wild west theme with the post-apocalyptic Fallout world. I played it as an FPS, since Vats made it way to easy. I really loved exploring in that game, because there was always something new to find. To this day, I don't think I explored all of it, and I have 98 hours clocked in that game. It also stand out as a game with DLC that was worth playing, adding hours of new content and interesting characters, not to mention new and awesome weapons. The K-9 Cyberdog gun was my favorite.

The Witcher 2 stands out as one of the few games I ever pre-ordered. I got it on Gog.com, so it was DRM free, plus I got some money off the price. I really liked playing as Geralt, especially since they got rid of the QTE combat system from the Witcher 1, even if it did have QTEs, which I hate. Since I don't want this to turn into a rant, I won't mention that again. I'll just say that it was nice to be the one telling Grealt how to fight, and not having the game tell me how to do it, even if in other parts it was telling me exactly how to play. The story is interesting, it's one of the few games I'm interested in playing just for the story. It's also a good example to other devs how a PC game should be handled, or maybe games in general. I got the Enhanced Edition, for FREE! Gotta love Cd Projeckt Red for doing that!

I can't write a blog about games that stood out thru my years as a gamer without mentioning Minecraft. That has got to be the closest thing I have to a favorite game, especially since I discovered mods and texture packs for it. With that game, at least, on the PC, you never have to be content with the way that vanilla looks and plays (except for the most basic things, like mining and crafting, if you don't like that go play something else!). There's so many mods it isn't even funny. I've got 47 installed now, and counting. I also like exploring the randomly generated worlds, there's always something new around the block shaped corner. I think my favorite thing about it is the multiplayer. Why? Because it's the same as the single player, just with more people! I wish more games were like that, if they're going to insist on having both.

Yes, that was hard, limiting myself to three games, plus the other ones I mentioned. There are a great many other games I could mention, but that would make this blog much longer then it already is, especially since I own over 200 games, so many I lost count.

I play games because I hate being bored, and like having my mind be entertained. I like having fun, and enjoying what I play. Problem is, I get bored easily, so I end up getting bored with a game and moving on to another, sometimes jumping back to the older game because I got bored with the new one, then jumping back to the new one because I got bored with the old one, or starting to play an entirely new game. That's how my collection got so vast. Plus, it didn't help that so many new and amazing games kept coming out, plus the Humble Bundles, plus the sales on Gog.com and Steam, and so on and so forth.

It really has been an journey being a gamer for over a decade. It was really quite the ride, and I look forward to many more decades of gaming to come. I can't wait to see what the future brings, and also to be the old guy on the gaming sites going "Back in my day, we had a keyboard and mouse, or a gamepad, we didn't have this newfangled controlling games with your mind!" Hmm, now that would be cool.

Thanks for reading this long, but hopefully not boring, blog.

That's all for now.

I might even call them HUGE plans!

If you've been following me on here, and reading my blogs, you most likely know about my struggles to find a job. If not, well, I've been looking for a job for the past three years, with no joy. It sucks, but now I'm almost glad that I didn't get one.

You also might know that I'm an aspiring filmmaker. I've been a PA on a few film shorts, which was a blast, and sparked my current drive to make movies. It's really always been a dream of mine, but never one I took seriously enough to try to do it. That is, until I got to work crew on those shorts.

And also that I have a tendency to change my mind about college a lot. If you read my last blog, you'd know I've been to college at least twice. It's actually been more like four. Three of 'em, the career ones, I'd be studying something, and realize that what I was studying to be was not something I actually wanted to be. The other one, I had a disagreement with them about my continuing to have financial aid. Why? Basically, it was because I suck at math so bad I couldn't pass pre-algebra, and it made my GPA to low. I think I might have Dyscalculia. I've never been officially diagnosed with it, but I do have a lot of the symptoms. Anyway, I didn't graduate from any of them colleges I went to.

More recently I tried to get into film school, at Full Sail. There were two reasons for that, one was so I could learn my craft, and two was so I could actually graduate from college. I got in pretty easily. However, I found out they put a life time cap on financial aid, and because I went to college before, I didn't have much left. I certainly didn't have enough to cover the $80,000 it would've cost me to go to Full Sail. Would it have been worth it? I think so. As it is, the only way I could've gone is if I worked while I was in school. I already mentioned my struggle to find a job.

Finding out I couldn't go to Full Sail really threw me for a loop. I had to take a while to get back in my groove and figure out what I was going to do. In the mean time I was watching a lot of youtube videos. And, while I was doing this, an idea slowly developed.

There are people who make YouTube movies for a living. People like Freddie Wong, and his buddy Brandon, who do Freddiew, Sam and Niko, who do Corridor Digital, Toby Turner, aka Tobuscus, Ryan Connolly, who does Film Riot, those folks at Indy Mogul, and Olga Kay. (That's actually in the order I started watching their vids, I probably like Olga the most, but it has nothing at all to do with the fact that I think she's an attractive lady. It has more to do with her sense of humor.) They do shorts, sketches, gaming vids, vlogs, and whole bunch of different things on YouTube. They all inspire me, and I've learned a lot from them.

The idea that developed was that I could be one of them, a Youtuber, instead just of a Youtubee. Being on YouTube could be a way for me to make a living doing what I love, making movies. So, I made plans, then launched myself on YouTube.

Now, I have my main channel, on which I vlog, and my games channel, on which I post game footage. With those channels, I hope to make a living, because of the ad revenue, in addition to other things I'm still figuring out.

However, it's not just about the money. I've always felt that I was put on this earth to entertain. I've only recently discovered how I want to do it, and my YouTube channels are part of it. I want to be able to connect with my fans (if I ever get any), and YouTube, along with social media, like Facebook and twitter, will allow me to do that.

I'm focused on creating content to entertain people with. If I can make money doing it, so much the better. If not, I'll still be doing it. Why? Because I love doing it. There's an old saying, do what you love, and you never work a day in your life.

I know being a professional Youtuber is a lot of hard work, and takes dedication. I also know I'll have to go out of my comfort zone, since I'm actually pretty shy. I've actually become less shy, except when I'm around women I'm attracted to. I still get like a deer in the headlights around them. Oy vey.

Anyway, right now I'm focused on setting things up that I can do on my own. I have another channel/project that I hope to partner with some people to work on, and make that my main show. That's my HUGE plan. I don't want to say to much about it just yet, since I'm still figuring things out how I want to do it. I will say that I'm collapsing all of my other movie projects I have talked about before into it. I want to start filming it sometime early next year. Hmm, I'll have to start inviting people to work with me on it soon.

I'm really looking forward to seeing where this takes me.

My main channel is MrStarduke. That's where I vlog, and I might do other stuff too. Just one vlog so far, but I'll be posting more.

My Games channel is MrStardukeGamez. Nothing there yet, but to celebrate Minecon I'll start it off with Minecraft!

Here's my MrStarduke Facebook Page. The best place to keep track of what I'm doing, since I'll be updating it a lot.

I'm MrStarduke on Twitter. I wouldn't have it if there wasn't a lot of cool people to track on there. And now I'm one of them!

I'm also MrStarduke on Steam. Go ahead and add me if'n you want to.

I also have a T-shirt shop. I design them myself. Gotta do something with what I learned in college.

There also my GSPN. Cool, huh?

Feel free to check 'em all out!

Thanks for reading this.

PS Why MrStarduke, when starduke is actually my favorite name to use? Because somebody on youtube beat me to it! I'm still not sure if MrStarduke is cooler or not, but it's the name I'm sticking with.

That's all, for now.

I used to attend IADT Orlando. Actually, I went there twice, before I really started taking making movies seriously, and decided to attend film school. But, enough about that.

The first time I went to IADT they had a gaming lounge. One of the programs at that college is game design, so it's not surprising that they had one. It was decked out all in black, with black walls, black tables that the TVs and consoles were on, and black chairs, and had gaming posters on the walls. They had a really nice one of Master Chief, and another of Solid Snake. It had all the consoles. They even decorated the roof, there was a ceiling panel painted with a fan art picture of Megaman on it. I got to be pretty good friends with the student who ran it. I think he was a federal work study, so he basically got paid to sit around and hang out and play games all day. Sounds like fun, huh?

I would go to that lounge between classes, or during breaks, if they were long enough. I played through Halo 2 and 3 in that lounge. I have fond memories of blasting Elites while doing my best to ignore my fellow students, who were quite noisy. I participated in a Halo tourney. I had fun, but I didn't make it past the first round, darn it. Of course, if I had had a mouse to aim, that dude that beat me wouldn't have stood a chance. I also played on the PS3, but I can't quite remember the games I played on it. The lounge had a projector, which we could hook up to a console, so we got to play games on a huge screen. Sometimes my fellow students would have impromptu fighting game tourney's on it, usually Super Smash Bros on the Wii. They were always a blast. I think I had more fun watching then playing. Some of those guys that played were really good, and I never was able to play enough to get any good. Sometimes, if we were lucky, some girls would even want to play. Some of them were quite good, others not so much. It was fun just to have them around.

When I left that school for the first time, I would look back fondly on my times in that gaming lounge. I made friends there, and could hang out with people who all had one thing in common with me, their love of video games.

The second time I went to IADT the gaming lounge was gone. It was the first thing I looked for, and I was very surprised and disappointed when I realized it was gone. The only thing left was the projector screen on the wall and good ole Megaman on the ceiling. They went through extensive remodeling while I was gone. The black walls were gone, replaced with tan ones. The chairs were replaced with large leather couches. They replaced the tables with ones that didn't have TVs or consoles on them. There were no more gaming posters. The gaming lounge had a personality, and now that it's gone, I feel like I lost a friend. They had replaced the gaming lounge with a generic student lounge, better suited to napping or grabbing a quick snack between classes. It was fine for hanging out, but no longer great for gaming. Sometimes a student would bring their console from home and plug it into the projector, and they would have an impromptu tourney, usually Tekken. But, it just wasn't the same. Sometimes some students would bring out their Yu-gi-oh or Magic cards, and play with them, but those aren't video games. Definitely not the same.

It was a place for students to get together and play video games. Of course, the game design students were there, but so were the ones from the other programs. It brought them together in ways the new lounge doesn't, because there are no more games. Instead of the camaraderie of playing video games and talking about them, they have people sitting next to each other and texting on their phones, not talking to each other. Instead of impromptu tourneys of Super Smash Bros, they have people sleeping on the couches. Instead of playing video games with girls, they don't have that. And that, my friends, is a tragedy.

Rest in peace gaming lounge, you were one of the good ones.

DLC stands for DownLoadable Content. It's content that isn't part of the main game, that wasn't on the disc of the game, hence players having to download it. Some publishers seem to be forgetting that. It could be anything from new outfits to map packs to new/alternate endings to expansions to whatever.

I have very little money to spend on games. So, when DLC comes out for a game I have, I always weigh it against potentially not being able to get another game as soon as I'd like. I only get DLC for games I really enjoyed, and want to play more of.

For me DLC falls into two categories, DLC that wouldn't be worth my money, and DLC that really gives me bang for my buck.

Saints Row the Third was a game I never thought I would play, because of the me being grossed out by the phallic bats, but, at the suggestion of some of my friends, I decided to get it, despite the phallic bats. It was not a decision I regretted, because the game was so fun it more then made up for them. I thoroughly enjoyed the game, and I still occasionally play it when I want to wreak some havoc, or just goof off.

However, I was disappointed by the DLC. It has 17 DLC out so far, and few, if any, add any content I would consider enough bang for my buck for me to get it. The DLC seemed to be more about nickle and dimeing the game's fans then really adding worth while content to the game.

As opposed to say, the DLC for Fallout: New Vegas.

New Vegas is my favorite Fallout game, with it's mix of post nuclear apocalypse and western elements. I clocked almost 100 hours in that game, and I still play it now and again when I want to wreak some havoc or just goof off. Yes, I like games that let me do that.

Most of it's DLC I considered worth getting. It added story content that was interesting, which had memorable characters, and weapons that were awesome. I enjoyed playing them so much that I didn't regret getting them. My favorite DLC was definitely Old World Blues. It had a gun with the brain of a dog!

T

That's what I call bang for my bark...er...buck!

And, now, the DLC is done, and they have the Ultimate Edition which has all of it along with the main game.

For me to consider DLC worth getting it had to add something meaningful to the game. New outfits and other odds and ends just don't make the cut. I'd rather be spending that money to add to my collection of hats then to buy them for my in-game characters. However, when DLC actually adds more to the story and many more hours of enjoyment to the game, it gives me a good excuse to take a trip to old familiar territory, now with a few new things to experience. Then it's giving me bang for my buck!

That's all, for now.

Howdy folks,

Today, I'm not talking about games. However, it does, in fact, have to do with Gamespot.

It's a comic I created on Pixton.com about Starduke, a character you saw here first. He's my avi on here, in case you didn't know. Over the years, he's pretty much become my mascot, or, as I call him, my signature character.

Before I post the link to the comic, I'd like to say a bit about Pixton. Feel free to skip down to the link.

It was introduced to me on the Flog, Felicia Day's video blog on GeekandSundry's Youtube channel. I thought it looked cool, so I decided to check it out. It was sorta cool, and sorta not cool. See, there's a very limited free version, which is what I used to create the Starduke comics, and there's a paid for version that you can get a monthly sub for. I don't get a monthly sub for MMOs, I"m sure as hell not going to get one from Pixton.

However, I do like that the art is pre-made, so I don't have to draw everything, and can focus on making the story. I can get character's that sorta look like what I'm going for, and backgrounds and props that sorta look like what I'm going for, and sorta get a comic that looks like what I'm going for. I had to be inventive with what they had to offer to free users to sorta get the look I wanted. I think it turned out sorta well.

So, yeah, check out the comic here: Starduke comic

It starts out with Starduke floating out in space, trying to hitch a ride. If you think it's funny, then good for you. If you don't think it's funny, then good for you as well.

I'm seriously considering doing a...what-ch-ma-call-it, a internet comic strip thing... about Starduke and his adventures, with art I create myself using Adobe Illustrator. After looking at what they have on Pixton, I've got some ideas how I can cheat with the art work, so I don't have to draw every single thing from scratch with each new strip. Some would call that lazy, but I would call it time saving, and thus smart. So, maybe someday there will be a NEW NEW Adventures of Starduke.

That's all for now.

Recently I started playing FEAR, a First Person Shooter (hereafter FPS) with horror elements. The FPS parts are good, but the horror sucks, in my opinion.

See, when the horror parts kick in, which they do only now and then, the character I'm playing as reacts to them. His pulse starts beating faster. He starts breathing faster. He starts PISSING ME OFF!

When I play a game I like to actually be in control of the character I play as. When he or she starts reacting to elements of the game, besides the occasional quip or grunt, it breaks my immersion. In FEAR the player character (hereafter PCH) is practically a non-entity, until the horror parts kick in, and he slaps the player in the face with his existence.

I also tried playing Amnesia: The Dark Decent. When the PCH started stumbling around I got so fed up I stopped playing. It completely wrecked my immersion.

It's one thing if a game is so well made it creeps me out, it's quite another when the PCH is creeped out because they were programmed too. I also think it is a cheap trick on the part of the devs.

I think my reaction is so strong because both FEAR and Amnesia are FPS. When the PCH reacts it breaks immersion, because I see the world thru their eyes. However, it's really my eyes, since I am the one controlling the PCH and playing the game. I should be the one reacting, not them.

Dead Space is a horror Third Person Shooter (hereafter TPS). The PCH is on screen most of the time, and can be seen to react to the environment around him. However, generally, he does so without interfering with my ability to control him. Also, since it is a TPS, he is an accepted part of the experience.

So far, the FPS part of FEAR is so good that I'll keep playing. However, instead of gettting creeped out when lil miss horror (you'll know who I mean if you play the game) shows up, I just get pissed and shoot at her. That is, I do, if the PCH isn't too busy being scared to let me.

That's all for now.

Sleeping Dogs is definetly one of the few games I've played recenlty that I can serioulsy call EPIC!

I love the focus on martial arts combat. I'm a marital artist myself, and it's nice to see a game with it thats not Street Fighter or some other fighting game.

However, the gun combat seems half-donkied, compared to the fighting. Honestly, I'd rather they have left it out, and have everybody Kung Fu fighting. Melee with blades not so good either, I hate it when weapons get dropped after only a few uses. A knife is a knife! I should be able to stab bad guys all day, then go home, sharpen it, and do it again tommorrow.

The driving around the city is nice. I like the GPS system, which is like the one in Saints Row 3. It makes getting around the city easy, but, since it's adaptive, it leaves room for going your own way while still sorta following the GPS. Also, once I figured out how to do it right, Action Hijack was freaking awesome! I love being able to jump between cars.

Street racing is a interesting diversion. It's almost good enough to be a game on it's own. I still haven't been brave enough to try Action Hijack during a race, but I intend to.

It's one of the few open world games where I've been focusing mainly on main story, but that's because there's not much else to do. Definetly not on a same level of Skyrim for stuff to do besides main story. So, it's good for those you that hate Skyrim because of how awesomely vast it is!

It's definetly worth checking out.

Now, I'm gonna watch the latest Flog. I admit to having a crush on Felica Day. She maneges to pull off cute and sexy at the same time, and, in my opinion, that's hard to do.

That's all for now.

You might have noticed that I gutted my blog. I used to have over 200 posts, and now I'm down to 130 something. I was looking thru my blog, and realized that some of what I posted was really depressing, and some was stuff I just didn't feel like having on my blog anymore, and some of it was both, so I started deleting entries. And now there's a lot less of me on my blog.

I'm ditching OTGF and OTHF. I'm going to maybe cease boring you with my personal life, because I've realized that it is pretty damn boring. So, when, or if, I ever do blog more, it's going to be more focused on games, like I feel it should be on a gaming site. However, there are times I feel like I have to tell somebody something, even if it's a total stranger on the internet, so you may see some more personal blogs in the future. Maybe. I'm just going to stop using OTGF and OTHF, so you'll just have to read my blogs to know if it's a gamecenteric blog or a mecentric one.

Damn, my life really is boring. Things don't seem to change at all. I still don't have a job. I still don't have my own place. I still don't have a girlfriend. I still don't have a car, or at least my scooter registered so I can use that. Heck, I still don't even have my driver's license! I'm also still trying to get started with my filming endeavor. That's the only thing that seems to be going anywhere, but it's being held back by not having those other things. Except the girlfriend, of course, which isn't a thing.

I spend a lot of my time filling out job applications, which is the most boring thing ever. Also, somewhat depressing, since I've applied to tons of jobs, even had a few interviews, and I still don't have a job. The rest of my time I spend reading, watching movies, playing games, writing, sleeping, and the other usual boring human maintenance stuff. I have no social life, I can't afford one. Honestly, I think the only thing keeping me sane is my entertainment. Well, that and my family, even though they can be annoying sometimes. Hmm, they aren't things either.

I'm just hoping things start going better for me, and I can get all those things I need. It'd also be nice to finally get a girlfriend, which, like I said, isn't a thing, but would be very nice to have.

That's all for now.

Howdy folks, long time no see!

Yeah, I finally got around to writing another blog. I got my Internet back, with a new wi-fi adapter which works great.

So, I've been able to get some games. And beat them. That's actually very rare, me actually bothering to beat a game. A game has to be especially interesting and fun to keep me from getting bored with it and moving on to play something else.

I played and beat RAGE. I really enjoyed that game. It was like a better version of Borderlands. And it had WINGSTICKS! Like a boomerang, but with three blades, and a lot more lethal. It got so that my Wingsticks became my main weapon, and they got me out of a few bad situations where if I hadn't had them to toss out I would've got killed. It had some interesting characters, and I couldn't help but notice that Claudia Black was the voice of one of them. Dang, that woman has a sexy voice.

I also got The Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena. It had Tages DRM, with limited activates, so normally I wouldn't have got it, but I saw it ridiculously cheap on DISC, and I *coughed* the game. And that's why DRM is stupid, children, it doesn't work and only inconveniences paying customers, unless they *cough* the game.

It came with Escape from Butcher Bay, so I got two games ridiculously cheap. And I beat them both. I enjoyed them both immensely. Playing as Riddick is really awesome. I thought it odd that it was a FPS, with guns, since I really didn't remember Riddick using them all that much in the movies. But, the combat was actually very good, and they had enough melee combat to satisfy my craving for carnage with blades. In Dark Athena you get Riddick's Ulaks to play with, which was very nice.

Well, that was nice. I don't blog very often, for a myriad of reason, mainly because I'm very busy, and the time I spend blogging I could be playing games. I may or may not post another one in the future.

THat's all for now.

I have a confession to make.

I never bothered to beat Mass Effect 1 or 2. Me 1 got tedious for me. I think maybe it was because I had already got Me 2 before I got 1, and the I liked what was in 2 more, so I never got very far in 1, I just played 2.

Then Me 2 got tedious for me. It was just one seemingly endless series of gotta get another teamate missions. So, I got bored with it and stopped playing.

I decided to wait until I got Me 3, and then play all three games in order, loading my Sheperd from one game to the next. I thought that it would be cool, from a story stand point, to see what Bioware did with that. I thought it'd be cool, since in the past, the distant past, Bioware was great. They made Knights of the Old Republic, my favorite Star Wars game of all time. So, of course, Mass Effect, something they made all by themselves, would be great.

Or so I thought.

I had heard that end of Me 3 was bad. So I looked it up on the web and spoiled it for myself. Well, I don't want to spoil it too much, but in my opinion the ending sucks. I'm very disappointed that Bioware would end the game series I had such high hopes for like they did. However, I was not surprised at all.

Let's say it's similar to the ending of Red Dead Redemption, another game I spoiled the ending for myself, and decided not to play because of how it ended.

It also ended similar to how the Autobots movie game for DS ended. I invested hours, days even, in the main character, a character I customized and named after myself, and after the hours and days I spent playing that game, I got to the end of the story. And at the end of the game they killed the main character. It happened in a cutscene, so I could do nothing about it. After investing my time and money in the game, in that character, making him the max level I could get, it was all for nought, because the stupid devs decided to make it worthless and kill that character off. I traded in that game, at a considerable loss, I might add, because I hated how it ended, and no way was I going to keep it in my collection.

So, because of how they end Mass Effect 3, similar to how that Transformers game ends, without giving the player any real choice in it, I've decided that I'm done with Bioware. They are Biowere to me. This was the straw that broke the camels back, as it were. Ever since they were bought by EA, they've been becoming a Shadow of what they used to be. Their games definitely are. Gone are the days of KOTOR, Jade Emipre, and Never winter nights.

And gone are the days of me playing Bioware's new games. If they can end a series with a character that I would have invested so much time in like that, carrying that character thru three different games, then I have no interest what so ever in playing any more of their games.

That's all for now.

Why 3? That's a question I've been asking a lot lately when I look at the latest releases or games that are still being made.

There's Max Payne 3, with a older and balder Max. I think that game could either be very good, or very bad, depending on what they do with it. The real question is...why 3?

There's also Assassin's Creed 3. From what I've read, it'll be a reboot of the franchise and may be set in Japan. Which is weird, because Desmond doesn't look part Asian to me. Meh, whatever, he probably will when they redo the character models for 3. Again I ask...why 3?

And, of course, there's the infamous Mass Effect 3. Now this 3 actually almost makes sense from a game standpoint. It's supposed to be the last story about Shepperd. But, still, I have to ask...why 3?

The answer is, of course, board rooms, or, more precisely, what is in them. Walking money bags who always want more money. Greedy people who really don't give a damn about us gamers, as long as we continue to buy their 3s.

It's a lot easier, and safer, for a company to put out a 3 or even a 2, then it would be to innovate and actually come out with something new. Especially considering the investment that goes into making a AAA video game nowadays. As soon as a game gets a established fanbase, people the company knows will shell out their dough for the next game, and the one after that, it can be almost garunteed there will be a 3.

Max Payne 3, to me, is not needed. Max fought his battles, he lost everything, then he fell, killing bad guys along the way. I haven't played to the end of Max Payne 2 yet, but I'm assuming it had an end. While seeing him older and balder is interesting, it still wouldn't feel like the same old Max to me. However, there are enough fans of Max Payne 1 and 2 to warrant a 3, and enough people who haven't played the first two, but have heard of them and would want to play 3, not to mention those who would just buy the game for the heck of it.

Assassin's Creed is like another Call of Duty. The original was epic, and the second one was even better, but now it feels like Ubisoft milked poor Ezio for all he was worth, and now they're tossing him aside like he's so much garbage. After playing Brotherhood, I really don't feel much like picking up Revelations, and 3 really doesn't have me much exited at all. It just seems so hollow to me, too much like COD`s soulless repetition. How much ya wanna bet they'll do the same thing with whoever they have to replace Ezio in 3?

Mass Effect 3 sounds like it's supposed to be Shepard's grand send off. At least Bioware seems like they intended to have three games from the beginning, though I consider Mass Effect 4 to be inevitable. While I may have a love/mostly hate relationship with EA/Bioware right now, I am actually considering getting 3, because it seems like it could be a really good game. Interestingly enough, it was an article in a print magazine called Game Master which got me interested in getting the game. It seems like 3 will truly be a action RPG, with customization like an Action RPG should have, and thus would be worth me checking it out. It would be nice to play all the games in order. However, a lot of the "features", like co-op and the social aspects, really seem like they will hinder what I care about most, a truly great single player experience, like I've come to expect from Bioware games. I really think additions like that speak to the COD and Facebook generations, and are definitely not targeted to old fans of Bioware and their single player greatness. I'm just glad they are making them optional, though it seems like they are reserving the best endings for the ones who actually bother to put work into the Co-op and social parts of the game. Oy vey, what else could I expect from the people who made the Old Republic instead of KOTOR3? That's one 3 I would've liked to see.

When it comes right down to it, the 3s, and the 2s, are just a way to make more money. The companies who make them know very well that fans of their franchises will shell out cash time and time again for yet another entry in their beloved series. I, myself, have done it many times. The newer interations of games do have some improvements on the orginals, and it is nice to revist old freinds again, but when those old freinds become shadows of their former selves, I think it's time to say enough is enough. Go ahead and have a 3, but please, come out with something new for your next game!

That's all for now.