What is coolness? Okay before everyone does their best impression of "the Fonz" (think about how that image comes to mind - it'll prove my point later) let's take a break and look at it scientifically. I know - yawn - but this is social science, so there are no beakers involved.

"Coolness" is really the combined nonverbal and verbal appearance of a person, created by combining personality with social awareness. It's a two part equation - the first part is personality - you can be as aware of all the popular trends as you want, but if you're completely anti-social, you're not going to be very cool.

The other part of the equation is social awareness - that is, how in tune you are to the memes (units of cultural exchange) aka the events, memories, trends, beliefs, values, icons, and language of a culture. You can have the greatest personality in the world, but when you step off the boat into a new country, chances are you look like a dweeby tourist. There are a few exceptions - a British accent being considered tre' chic in the states - but those are societally constructed (mostly by James Bond movies) so they prove the rule.

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So we've established what "cool" is - an outgoing personality mixed with a high social awareness. How does that translate into being cool? These two traits allow a person to give off an aura of confidence, appear "in their element", chat with new people, say just the right things at the right time, and share discussion of common events.

So how on earth could playing videogames make someone cool? Well - because we're all playing them.

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omg wtf gaming meme

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Let's face it, gaming is its own culture - it has come a long way from the days of reading Nintendo power in your parent's basement. Games are everywhere, nearly everyone is playing them, and the latest games, consoles, and handhelds are hot topics that take front page even in mainstream media. The tweens, the teens, the twenties, the thirties, and now even the baby-boomers are targeted audiences for the gaming craze.

Games themselves are going two steps further by becoming self-referencing culture, as well as cross-culturally connected. Games like GTA IV contain dozens upon dozens of well-known songs - not only does GTA IV ingrain itself in the existing musical culture it pens from, and the New York culture it copies, but it also spreads those memes to an audience that isn't aware of them

GTA IV teaches the urban audience about gaming, and the gaming audience about urban culture, stirring the cultural melting pot, and creating a mutual understanding.

Games like Rock Band and Guitar Hero make the music of an older generation cool to a younger generation, while making gaming accessible to an older generation. The inter-cultural mix makes that "old dude who plays guitar" into "that cool guitar guy at the coffee shop" and turns what would have been "some dweeb" into "that awesome Guitar Hero player on YouTube".

It's not just that gaming has become cooler, it's that gaming itself has reshaped culture, integrated into existing cultures, redefined what our culture, both as gamers and the new generation, thinks - all while overtaking movies as the new hip industry.

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But playing a videogame doesn't make you cool... or does it? Videogames are part of our culture, being ignorant of them - like Jack Thompson, most of the US congress, and MADD (with their latest GTA "drunk driving" comments) - conveys to our generation that they are uncool, unhip, and behind the times.

Playing games is part of life now - and playing the games of our times - Mario Galaxy, Halo, The Sims, GTA IV, Orange Box, Call of Duty 4, et cetera has become an important part of being involved in the ever growing gamer-culture.

Games alone won't make you cool - if you've got a bad personality, or simply aren't interested in social interaction, a few rounds of Mario Kart aren't going to change that, but the reality has become that it's the kid who *doesn't* own some kind of Gameboy these days who is the odd duck out. Of course culture is a complex thing, clothing, language, appearance, voice, personality, awareness, social ability - these things are all going to shape just how much of a "with it" kind of person you're capable of being. At the end of the day though, videogames are becoming a shared experience that gives us something to talk about, argue over, debate, share, and party - they're an invaluable medium for building friendships, culture, and communication - and a channel through which memes are flowing full force.



And what about all those people fighting in System Wars over which console or game is "the coolest"? Just the jocks arguing with the band kids - at the end of the day they both play on the football field. So game on trendy hipsters and - as "the Fonz" would say - "Live fast, love hard, and don't let anybody else use your comb!"

Grand Theft Auto IV is the forerunner for GOTY. I didn't believe the reviews until I had a chance to play it for myself, and "wow!" - there's simply no rating this thing. Review sites have been handing out tens to this title, but honestly I'm stumped as to how you actually review a game like GTA IV. What's unique about it is - it's a game where, no matter what you want to do, gameplay, characters, and stories unfold before you.

There are open "sandbox" games, where you can "do anything" yet there's nothing to really do. There are linear games that tell a great story, or have a great experience - yet those collapse when you try and stray from the beaten path, only to find those little sidepaths and background characters to be ornamental. In GTA IV, I have yet to feel gatted - yet in every moment there are dozens of things to do. Without really thinking about it, I'm making choices that shape the story - yet also the experience I want to have and enjoy.

It's hard to describe how this is different than the vast majority of games that offer that kind of freedom - but it feels like "next gen" has become "current gen" as the kind of gameplay foreshadowed by STALKER becomes a hard reality. All that talk aside - there's a main point here: it's fun. It's fun in ways that make the games you previously called "fun" now objects of shame. Why was I killing the same dudes over and over again in some FPS? I don't know anymore - those were actions from a time when we just didn't know better.

GTA IV changes everything - it's not just prime, I'm willing to go back to the old name "perfect" - sure, in some future world, yet another game will come, a decade from now, that reinvents everything, yet makes us feel like we've been playing it all our lives. That game is GTA IV, and I absolutely love it.

I just saw the news off an AP feed, it probably won't be in the papers or out in the main news until tomorrow, but... legendary game designer Will Wright has been shot. He's alive, in stable condition at a Los Angeles hospital, though doctors say the bruising is "epic". Details are sketchy at the moment, but it appears Wright was having dinner in his hotel room with Chris Avellone (famed designer of Planescape Torment), when the two became engaged in a debate about gaming platforms. Wright argued strongly for the PC and Wii being progressive, open platforms, while Avellone, a supporter of "hardcore" design on the 360 and PC apparently became enraged at Wright's comments.

Jim Sturgson, a hotel patron in the room next to Wright's, said he heard loud conversation, a crash, and then three muffled gunshots. He dialed the police from his cell phone. When authorities arrived on the scene fifteen minutes later, they found an unconscious, paint-covered Will Wright, with a red-faced Avellone still yelling at the prone body.

"It was unbelievable," said one officer at the scene, "you see this in Hollywood sometimes, a small-time guy gets mad at the big shot, they have a fight, we show up at the party to break it up - but there maybe one guy gets a black eye - this is something entirely new".

Police were forced to mace Avellone, who has been arrested and is undergoing questioning by the LAPD. Will Wright was unavailable at the time of publication for comment. The LAPD have released that Avellone was armed with a Spyder Marker and fifty rounds.

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This is nuts, and the worst part is, this is going to be a huge blow in the media to gaming. You just know that Fox News is going to blow this whole thing out of proportion, and we're never going to hear the end of how "violent videogames" cause crime.

Normally I wouldn't publish a conversation and call it an editorial. Then again, normally game designers don't vomit in a plastic case, shrink wrap it, and call it a videogame. When Peter Molyneux gets involved with, well, anything those lines get a little blurred. I was talking to none other than MusicalMac (of the GameSpot mod team) on the issue, and our thoughts were rather similar. It's not that I have anything personally against Peter Molyneux, really he made Populous and Dungeon Keeper, so he deserves a little credit - it's that whatever talent he has is characteristically sidetracked by his unique ability to be completely distracted by utterly boring things.

Take Fable 2 for instance, Molyneux has spent more time at press discussing the "pet dog mechanic" than any other aspect of the game. At a certain point, you just want to stop and ask "Peter, Fable 2 is a role-playing game, shouldn't your focus be on the story, characters, and world more than on how often some mongrel will pee on your shoes?" Really, the fact that a dog may, after several hours of absence, charge out of the woods to aid me in combat (presumably by biting my enemies in the shins) does little to edify my involvement in the world of Fable.

"Is today the day Fluffy returns?" Who cares?

When you factor in a host of new "casino-st yle" minigames releasing prior to Fable 2, the rather short gameplay length, and the emphasis on a handful of character possibilities (buy any house, get pregnant with anyone's child!) over true customization, combat, and storyline, well it doesn't sit right with me. That isn't to say I'm opposed to freedom (in fact, I love it) but openness is only interesting when it's matched with an engaging world (Fallout 2) and not so much when I'm wandering a hollow landscape populated with stock characters (Oblivion). Peter Molyneux has accomplished something unique with Fable 2, in making a game where you can roleplay as an unwed teenage mother, gambling her last dollar to get food for her baby, sound utterly uninteresting.

And thus, my conversation with MusicalMac:

Subrosian - The video review of Fable 2 would be me beating up Peter Molyneux. Fable 2 does not sit right with me.

MusicalMac - I could stand to watch 15 or 20 minutes of Molyneux beatings. Fable 2 also does not sit right with me.

Subrosian - Three minigames where you "earn money" for Fable 2 on XBLA...

MusicalMac - I'm not looking forward to... "interesting one button combat" what? Has one button combat ever been... interesting?

Subrosian - Uhhh, no?

MusicalMac - Correct!

Subrosian - Even Mario has two-button combat: jump and fireball

MusicalMac - Three if you count the spin jump from Super Mario on the SNES

Subrosian - True

MusicalMac - So there you have it. Peter - stop it.

Subrosian - And it's [super mario world] not even an RPG, which revolves around combat. He's a stoner, we just need to come out and say it - Peter Molyneux has a fascination with uninteresting things. Or, at the very least, impractical things.

MusicalMac - It doesn't matter how well you can sell it, Peter - boxed poo still stinks once opened. It only gets worse when you subject it to lasers and spinning things.

Subrosian - *laughs* The achievements are going to be tied to earning enough money to buy every house, town, shop, et cetera in the game.

Musicalmac - There, the Publisher is happy...

Subrosian - Look, let's just shoot Peter Molyneux - he's so high he won't notice anyway. *

MusicalMac - He may be high, but Fable 1 wasn't a total bust. Fishing was fun.

Subrosian - If I want to fish, I'll play Animal Crossing - the characters are deeper than Fable's

MusicalMac - Touche.

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And there you have it. Sure, I could get into a lengthy discussion about how the idea of multi-game integration has been done before, discuss the ethics of charging an additional $15 (three arcade games at 400 points each) for minigames that seem like they could have been included with the game, or perhaps a timeline of Molyneux's decline from glory - but then I'd be as boring as Peter. As they say "keep on trucking" - and don't forget to bring your pillow to the Fable 2 launch party - a late night release of a boring game - it's cliche - but "hell-o snooze fest!"

*Editor's Note: I do not actually advocate gun violence against Peter Molyneux. Besides, if we leave him alone for long enough he's bound to bore himself to death.

Microsoft has got no mercy. Fable 2, Ninja Gaiden 2, Gears of War 2, XNA - BOOM! Headshot. Not just "oh you can see how it works tomorrow". No, turn on your 360 - you can start seeing the future today. If you're just joining us, you've been living in the dark age before Microsoft decided GDC is the next E3, and blew our goddamn minds. Tomorrow and Friday are going to rock, hell, I'm taking Friday off just to watch coverage, because this is friggin' sweet.

New Xbox 360 Bundle / SKU

Evidence:

1. Major retailers are out of Xbox 360s, and receiving only small shipments. Target, Best Buy, EBGames, GameStop, all out. All Best Buys in the state of Florida are extremely low or out of Xbox 360s, including the Halo 3 Edition. Target has only limited availability at select stores.

2. Microsoft just launched a Halo 3 Bundle in China, with a pack-in controller, and a copy of Halo 3.

3. The Game Developer's Conference is February 18 - 22.

4. Major games, such as GTA IV, will be two months away as of GDC, and we will see several major game announcements.

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Could all of this point to new bundles or SKUs at GDC? It's a possibility - it's unlikely Microsoft would gamble away profits by price cutting, but packing in a popular game such as Halo 3 could help them maintain momentum. What do you think?