Wow, it has been a long time since I've been here. Feels a little like going back home - except my Mom isn't here which is a bonus!

First of all, Hi Everyone! Hope everything is good in your worlds. I'm not going to take a bunch of time to catch up right now because I need to get something out of my head and sometimes writing it does that for me.

I still game daily and I have entered the world of online MMO's on my iPad. I went through a few before I finally settled on one that seemed ok - Lords and Knights. I really like the game concepts and mechanics for the most part. Right now after spending months and months building my kingdom, I'm ready to punt the game to the curb. Ok, NOT the game, but the other people playing the game.

At the risk of sounding like johnsteed7, I HATE PEOPLE!!!!!!!

So here's how it goes down...I join an alliance, become a member of the council, help build up smaller players by sending them resources...haha, when I put it down in black and white it sounds kind of ridiculous. I worked my butt off for that alliance. But I digress...the alliance merges with another, things go downhill (too many cooks kind of thing), several original people create new alliance and I gladly jump ship. Well, in my opinion, the new alliance was not everything that was promised by the leadership so I decide to part ways with them and just play my own way til I get tired of the game. Matt is also playing and we have our own 2 man alliance that is great fun.

After a few weeks of blissful peace, I get a message from leader of last alliance asking me if I would be willing to trade some of my castles since they're in his area. He said some of the other big alliances wanted them and he was expecting me to get attacked soon. I get that, alliances pick on the little guy. I checked with some of my other sources and found that there were no plans in the works for taking my castles from anyone else There were only 7 and they were in an ok spot, but nothing special. I had friends still in the neighborhood that I would help out from time to time and I was probably a little emotionally invested since they were my original castles. Regardless, I was mad because I felt like I was being threatened...if you don't let me have them, then someone else will take them kind of thing. I politely declined and said I wanted to keep my castles.

Lo and behold, 2 weeks later I get frantic messages from several people still in my old alliance that there are plans to take my castles by force. I know, I know, I'm so threatening and scary that they needed a whole big plan. . Wth? These are people I considered my friends and of the whole lot of them, 4 people decided to not attack me? And I know, it's a game of conquering...I get that...but just because it is a game does NOT mean that there are not real people with real feelings behind those pixelated castles. Does loyalty no longer exist? Is friendship not worth anything to anyone if it gets in the way of world domination (even on the server scale)?

After a few days of relentless attacks, I'm down 8 castles - I gave 5 to a neighboring player NOT in said alliance just to spite them. I'm trying to give away a few more before they're taken. I'm defending the heck out of the rest so that even if they do get them, they're going to take tons of losses.

Back to where I started: I hate people....so, put a whole bunch of people together and give them some power and they become monsters. I guess it's probably worse online because of the anonymity. People just don't care...it has really reminded me of the psychology experiments Matt and I have watched that involved making one group the prisoners and one group the guards and seeing how they interact. Give people some (make believe) power and it's Lord of the Flies all over the place. :/

I think my time with game is nearing an end - after I hold out for a little while longer and prove that I won't die. Lol, you can't really die in the game, you get reset and have to start all over. I could continue to be a thorn in their sides forever! They can never win because I could keep coming back. . It's not worth all that to me, but I know I could do it. :p

Thank you for listening. I feel lots better. . Have a great day.

~ Toni